There once was a girl back in high school that straight-up annoyed the piss out of me. She was in a handful of classes, she was on pom, and again – her voice, her slouch, and her demeanor grated on me. So of course I developed a crush on her. Call it “thin line between love and hate”… I call it dysfunctional. And I’m afraid the same thing is happening with Heidi Montag… I think. It’s all so confusing this thing called love lust indifference love.
Let me say this: I-should-not-know-who-this-person-is. I should not know the names Lauren Conrad, Audrina Patridge (when she has NSFW pix like this and this it’s hard not to), and Spencer Pratt because I do not watch MTV. I am not “The Hills” target audience, yet I read blogs with similar sentiments about the cast and show, and lo and behold – I’m savvy.
So I guess what I’m asking Santa for a divorce proceeding between my dear sweet Heidi and that douchenozzle, Spencer. By the time the paperwork’s filed, I may no longer want to be with her, but at least she’ll be available if I change my mind. Bonus: she’ll be free of the douchenozzle.
P.S. Does she do anything other than hang out in a bikini? The answer is yes – she sings in a bikini, too.
(SIDENOTE: Heidi, I could have directed a video at least TWICE as good as your boy did.)