Monday Night Football Trivia was in full effect last night, and I learned that there were more U.S. soldiers in the Korean War vs. the Vietnam War, Turkey was not only a part of the Ottoman Empire and Iran was not only Persia (they were both a part of Mesopotamia), and prior to “Titanic,” the highest grossing Best Picture winner was “Forrest Gump.”
While the competition occurred (we were in third place before the last question, but we wagered all of our points on “Gone With the Wind” on guess-which-question), these were some of the topics of discussion:
- I have had a song stuck in my head for a few days. I had the melody and this lyric: And somebody picked on me. It turns out that the lyric is actually: And somebody snitched on me. The song was “I’m Getting Nothing for Christmas.” (Thanks to Kelly for playing Scooby Doo on that one.)
- Talk about holiday parties began, and about how cool it would be to hire a waiter or waitress for New Year’s Eve. I thought it’d be funny to hire one for any day. Have a couple of friends over… the waiter/waitress can change the channel, get us beers and snacks… you know, stuff like that. When nothing was going on, the waiter/waitress could play video games with us, or watch the season finale of “Lost” with us. We wouldn’t be dicks about it. It would be for the sake of uncomfortable awkwardness and a good story to tell.
- Speaking of dicks – this store’s name brought us grown infants a heaping amount of joy:
- I originally saved this file as ‘dicks,’ but changed it for obvious reasons.
We talked about how their midnight madness sales could be called “nocturnal emissions” and that the idea for the event “came to them at night.” This was the least crass example – trust me.
The night ended not at the bar, but playing “Call of Duty 4” once again. As we were leaving, paintball was brought up, and one friend stated he would wait in a tree outside my other friend’s house in order to ambush him. Due to the cold weather we’re experiencing, it was also brought up how he would freeze to death waiting. Since this particular friend is leaving the state for a new job, everyone would think he left early, and no one would notice he was missing until the spring. But since my friend didn’t clean all the leaves that are awaiting under two feet of snow, his body would get lost in the leaves… yada yada… I’ll stop there. This is what video games are doing to adult minds – imagine what they do to the kids.
In case you’ve been living under a rock or in a coma (which in the cases of you really being a hermit or a recently awakened patient, then I’m sorry about the sarcasm), next March may or may not be the month that “Watchmen” gets marched out (see what I did there with the, um, doubling months thing).
There’s still a lawsuit pending between Fox and Warner Bros. over the rights to the story, but little did I know how much this affected me. All night I dreamt about this movie. My brain tried to convince me it was going to be crappy, too. I saw images of the film being projected on screen as though it were still a comic book graphic novel.
It was comparable to this:
Or even worse, the first “Hulk” flick.
What follows at the bottom of the post is the most recent preview for “Watchmen.” It can’t be bad, can it? Like “Sin City 2” “Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow 2” “The Spirit” level bad?
All I’m saying is Fox better not fuck this up for me… I don’t know if I can take more nights of tossing and turning and seeing the Comedian so sad (he’s the guy with the moustache at the start of the preview). The kicker is Fox doesn’t even want shared profits – they don’t want it released! Fox owes me for cancelling many-a-splendid shows, such as “Arrested Development,” “Firefly,” “Futurama,” “The Tick,” and “Profit.”
They sure as hell better not cancel “Watchmen.”
As I arrived at the office today, I realized something. Well, just now I realized I’m either borderline British or pretentious because I was thisclose to typing realised, both times. But the main thing I realised is that I have a real aversion to these bad boys:
- Knock-knock… Who’s there?… Germs… Germs ach-who!
There’s two ways to get to my office, and I choose the way that has three doors to open vs. two. You would think I’d choose the lesser of two infectious evils, but the path to more doors (must resist “Lord of the Rings” reference here… too late) consists of these precious humdingers:
- I can open you with one finger… resisting other off-colour remarks… another Brit/pretentious retort!
If you think about how many disgusting hands that have touched these things… it gives me the gee-willikers (now I’m prohibition era comic strip talking). I’d still rather use one finger to open the second doorknob, than use my entire hand on the first.
Now you know, and knowing is half the fracas (so pretentious it is.)