Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Is Diablo Cody Trying To Tell Us Something?

Remember the Alamo the Titans that Coinkydink stands for Coincidence, and that Coinkydonk sits for On Purpose. Comprende?


"She's soy sauce, and I'm Worcestershire," Juno might say of Jennifer, apropos of nothing.

I feel like writer Diablo Cody is a kindred spirit.  We’re both from the Midwest.  We’re both Children of the 80’s.  We’re both bloggers.  We’re both screenwriters (I’m just not yet produced).  And we’re both exhibitionists (she was a stripper; I enjoy walking around the mall in a long brown trench coat… that’s all I’m saying).

But of late, I noticed something about Ms. Cody’s produced works.  So far she has three: Juno, Jennifer’s Body, and United States of Tara. And they all share something thematic in common.


Tara with her Id, Ego, and Superego

Let it be known, I was fortunate enough to see Juno before it became the Incredible Hype, and I was knocked a bit off my feet by its sentiment and reality, despite the strange language that filled the characters’ mouths at the get-go.  I’m still not sure if the movie laid off the weird speak as the movie progressed, or if I got used to it (and who am I to knock weird speakCoinkydink or Coinkydonk?), but I never held it against the flick.

Jennifer’s Body, on the other hand, felt like a misstep.  There was a lot of potential for homages, over-the-top zaniness, and ironic parallels to real high school life that never came to fruition, but this film spurned my thought processes.  Then I recalled her Showtime series, and it clicked:

All Diablo Cody’s characters are women dealing with things inside their bodies.

  • Juno – a baby
  • Jennifer – a succubus
  • Tara – multiple personalities

There’s an old adage about writing: “write what you know.”  It’s not surprising (and it’s actually quite refreshing) that Ms. Cody’s scripts would center on female leads, but it is interesting to note the duality involved in each of the above characters, considering the duality of Ms. Cody herself (if that’s her real name).  Until she inevitably directs and becomes a true auteur, we’re left to wonder how her adaptation of Sweet Valley High will end up, or her future original works.

(SIDENOTE: I’m reminded of the oeuvre of screenwriter Larry Cohen, which includes: Phone Booth, Cellular, and Messages Deleted.  And there’s always Eric Roth, and his Curious Case of Benjamin Gump, plus his Forrest Button.)

So what do you think?  Is it a Coinkydink or a Coinkydonk…

Happy Find… Jimmy Fallon’s “7th Floor West”

Tonight is the sixth season premiere of The Hills, and I hate to admit this but the show fascinates me.

It’s not like a car wreck or guilty pleasure kind of thing… The best analogy I can think of is that it’s hypnotic like a campfire.

You watch the flames move around without rhyme, reason, or purpose, sucking in the oxygen, destroying that from which it springs.  When two logs strike each other, sparks fly.  It makes you feel warm and fuzzy because you know you’re safe, and far from burning in the random pointlessness of the hot embers.  You enjoy marshmallows on chocolate in between graham crackers.

That’s exactly what watching The Hills is like.

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more about “Hulu – Late Night with Jimmy Fallon: …“, posted with vodpod

And that’s the very essence that Late Night With Jimmy Fallon captures in their spoof series, 7th Floor West.  So grab some mini marshmallows and a box of Teddy Grahams and click the image to link to the campyfire that is Jimmy Fallon’s 7th Floor West (all the episodes):

Jimmy and ZOMG! He's with Whitney Port from "The City"!

Jimmy and ZOMG! He's with Whitney Port from "The City"!

In My Brain While Sleeping… Tweaking Existing Toylines

Those that claim to know me might say that I’m a child at heart.  Those that really know me would call me an overgrown child.  According to my subconscious, I have the mind of a child.  I prefer to say I’m living the 13 year-old me’s dream…

This set of dreams involved a pair of toy collections that I’ve previously mentioned on this post, but were sort of blended together.  It was the Lego Batman video game, and though I haven’t played it in a while, that did not prevent me from dreaming that there was a Batman toy collection that was kind of like a model train town set (Exhibit A) and a bit like Playmobil (Exhibit B).

Tiny figurines representing each of the characters could be purchased, as well as scenery components, and you could assemble a miniature Gotham City similar to Exhibit C.  I guess there’s a toy line called Imaginext that’s kind of like what I envisioned (Exhibit D), but I still imagine(xt) something much darker…

Where the other half of the Lego Batman connection ends up has nothing to do with a Lego town (Exhibit E).  It’s more like the Marvel Legends action figure collection (Exhibit F).  Every Lego set you purchased could be put together (or should I say combined because of course Lego sets are put together) with other Lego sets to make bigger predisposed items.  Again, not like Exhibit E, but like how Galactus is assembled in Exhibit F.

You see, Galactus’ head comes with Professor X, and other pieces of him are packaged along with five other figures in that series.  So if you buy all six figures, you can make Galactus.  That’s how the Lego sets worked…

Never mind.

You’re adults… you don’t understand.

Hibbidy-Wah?! Humanimals Creep Me The F— Out

With Halloween upon us (and the one year anniversary of this blog’s creation – woohoo!), I’ve recently made a purchase in preparation for the slew of parties coming up.

Usually, there’s not a slew (and only one that may or may not be hosted by me), and usually, I have the energy to make my own costume out of cardboard.  Not so this year!

Without giving anything away, like mentioning I picked up a gorilla costume at Target, for example, I fear I might have dunked my toe into the pool of weirdness that is these folks: Humanimals.

Your glory is that I couldn’t pick just one…

(click for more after the jump)

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Awful Battle… Crappy Movie Endings That Are (Surprise!) Crappy

It’s been said that a movie’s ending will make or break it.  In the case of these films, they were already broken, so the finales bring it on home.


American Anthem

Don’t let the pectacular stud on the poster fool you, this ending is full of non-sequiturs.  Apparently, this film featured like 100 characters and required as many asides, glances, and incidents of closure.  Don’t believe me about the amount of reaction shots?  Look out for:

  • the creepy coach with dentures
  • moustached gymnasts
  • a mentally-challenged (?) wolfman-ish brother (?)
  • an 80’s rocker girl
  • Ocean Spray logos
  • smoking hands
  • the bad kid from Karate Kid
  • a Santa Claus biker with his child sidekick
  • lots of thumbs-ups
  • the return of an absentee (possibly recovering alcoholic) father
  • flashing lights
  • an army of gay bikers
  • Mary Lou Retton (?)
  • Little Orphan Annie

Click Poster For Video


Made for CBS in 2005, at first viewing, you would think this film was intending to be a tongue-in-cheek comedy.  According to iMDB IMDb, these are the categories it falls under:

Action | Sci-Fi | Horror | Drama | Thriller

With scenes like this it’s hard to believe, but with an ending like the one below, I’m thinking IMDb is full of kidders.


Click Poster For Video


What can I add to the splendor of the horror that is this inept piece of cinema.  Oh yeah.  R.O.T.O.R. stands for: Robotic Officer Tactical Operation Research.  The flick’s poster is more robotic than the robot in the film, and it’s made of paper.


Click Poster For Video

Student Confidential

This one already made it’s way around the TripleDoubleU, but it has to be included in this Awful Battle.  Creepy must hang in the air around any of the Jackson family… in this case, it’s Michael’s brother, Marlon.


You Know What To Do

JusWondering… What Do These Cell Phone Notes Mean?

It’s been awhile since I’ve checked out the notes on my old phone (mostly because I’ve since purchased a new phone), but I was going through transcribing the tips and ideas.  I understood most.  These left me clueless:

  1. loren lion
  2. stat based
  3. rhett butler flog
  5. face movie pix
  6. 2 24th cleo arrest
  7. kangaroo
  8. barely hear my own horn

First off, loren lion. Was this a clever name I feared I would forget?  Was it a particular lion I needed to look into?  Maybe the answer was based in statistics.

Why I put this:


With this guy:


Might make my brain

Face movie pix could have been an invention, or a story idea, or a… picture of faces in a movie?

I think the cleo arrest might have something to do with Miss Cleo getting arrested, but I don’t think she was ever incarcerated, 2 times, let alone a 24th time.

Um, yeah… he exists:

Yeah... whattaboutit?

Yeah... so whattaboutit?

And I guess it’s true: I can barely hear my own horn.  I’m glad I made a note of it.

Musical Musings… Masterful Feline Musicians

I really wish I would have saved this picture:

Play him off, cat piano!

Can't wait for the Meow Re-Mix

Perviously used in this post, it goes along purrfectly with this edition of Musical Musings.  If you dove into this post willy-nilly without reading the above title, or if you have an aversion to reading large letters in bold typeface, allow me to introduce you to two of the most fascinating felines ever to grace the music scene (not counting Keyboard Cat or Josie and the Pussycats*, ‘natch). 

The Classical Approach:

The Modern Take (wait for the breakdown at the end):

The Interpretive (Canine) Dance:

*It’s a shame, but I forgot how cute Tara Reid actually was, and I really do miss Rachael Leigh CookWha’ happen to her? And look how young Rosario Dawson, um,  looks.  Eight years really makes a difference, I guess.  And that’s my deep thought for the day.

The Sh– To Just Sh–ty… USPS

Established in 1775 by Benjamin Franklin, the United States Postal Service was a necessity.  People wanted to get messages to each other, and due to the Great Falcon Shortage of 1772 and the Mass Page Suicide Pact of 1774, providing this service was a must.  Though many people who “know” history will “claim” the Great Falcon Shortage and Mass Page Suicide Pact never happened, this truth remains – the US Postal Service was The Shit.

"Get yer hope right hyere..."

"Get yer hope right hyere..."

 Think about it.  How else did people communicate?  By talking face-to-face and… um, by telling somebody else to send a message.

Sometimes they ring four times...

Sometimes they ring four times...

In our modern age, we forget how essential the USPS was to building our country, and I don’t want to go into specifics (mostly because I don’t feel like looking them up), but according to – who else – Wikipedia:

Employing 656,000 workers and 260,000 vehicles, it is the second-largest civilian employer in the United States (after Walmart) and the operator of the largest civilian vehicle fleet in the world.

So the question that remains – how have they become Just Shitty?

Is it a sense that they aren’t as vital to our country anymore, given that we have other methods of communication, bill paying, and package sending?

Or are my feelings strictly personal?  The USPS was afterall responsible for these deliveries:


Strike 1...


Strike 2...