I don’t know why I ever feel compelled to proclaim how strange a dream is when I’m revealing it either way.

One handed drum roll please:

It became apparently clear to me in My Brain While Sleeping why The Walt Disney Company gobbled up Marvel Comics (aside from the fact they wanted another marketing outlet comparable to Time Warner’s hold on DC Comics, as well as supplying the much-needed financial backing a major corporation could give the flailing superhero imprint… whew).

The entire reason could be summed up in this crappily made picture:

You see, upon leaving Disney/ABC’s Home Improvement, best child star Jonathan Taylor Thomas left to star in the unreleased film, Machine Boy.  Realizing a bit too late into production that they had an Iron Man ripoff on their hands (and a clunker to boot – puns intended), Disney shelved the movie fearing lawsuits of copyright infringement.  But worry no more!  As soon as they could, the little old lady that swallowed the (Mickey) mouse swallowed the spider (man), and you heard it here first:

WALT DISNEY and MARVEL COMICS proudly present

MACHINE BOY

JUNE 2011