Another day, another new category. I’ve wanted to do a list-type post for a while now, but how many should be on it? How about a handful?
Today’s list isn’t composed of films I’d call guilty pleasures. No… embarrassing pleasures might be more accurate. These are all films I’d love to recommend, but I’m afraid of what you’d think of me.
Let’s start with the obvious ones (for people who know me):
THE REASON I LIKE IT: The love story in the past is contrived, sure… boy meets girl, mom disapproves of boy, girl breaks it off, boy goes to war, girl gets engaged to another boy, boy fixes house and wins girl back. But for me, it’s the frame story that makes the entire film work. And the ending? Blubbering fool = me.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: Didn’t you read what I just wrote?
THE REASON I LIKE IT: I never read the children’s book it was based on so the movie’s ending shocked me. Once again, blubbering fool = me.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: It’s based on a children’s book. And the blubbering fool part.
THE REASON I LIKE IT: It’s weird. The basic concept? In the post-apocalyptic future, a boy and his telepathic dog hunt for food and women for the boy to bang. Seriously. It’s like a tripped out Alice in Wonderland, except not at all.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: It’s weird. And did you see the film’s tagline? “A rather kinky tale of survival.” Yeah.
THE REASON I LIKE IT: It tries to be exciting, inventive sci-fi. It really does. And to be honest, I find it more creative than Avatar.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: It’s a Vin Diesel movie. And it doesn’t try hard enough. Necromongers? Underverse? Conan the Barbarian ripoff ending? Well, that was kind of cool. It’s just that I usually ridicule my friend Jay for liking these type of crappy movies (Starship Troopers, Battlefield Earth, Stargate), and I can’t rip on him for this one. Well, I do, but hypocritically.
THE REASON I LIKE IT: It’s funny, it’s heartfelt, and it contains one of Tom Hanks sincerest performances. Even Madonna and Rosie O’Donnell fail to annoy me. Plus, Madonna’s This Used to Be My Playground is (arguably) a touching ballad. And if you have siblings, how can you not relate to the story of competitive sisters? Oh, and one more thing (I’m beginning to see a pattern here)… the ending turns me into a blubbering fool.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: Do I really need to go into it?
THE REASON I LIKE IT: What are all good horror stories essentially about? Their cautionary tales. The 80’s slasher flicks prayed upon this idea like fat kids and ice cream. What did they teach? If you have sex – you’re gonna die. If you do drugs – you’re die. This film merely upped the ante in those departments, and added an international relations angle. If you’re a boorish American in a foreign country – you’re gonna die. Plus, this movie made me apprehensive about travelling abroad (I’ve since gotten over the fear by visiting Amsterdam and surviving being a boorish American).
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: It’s a gross (and boorish) film.
THE REASON I LIKE IT: It’s an odd mixture of the schlocky Italian giallo and the raunchy American slasher. It really feels like two movies overlapped into one cohesive and oddly entertaining film.
THE REASON I LOATHE ADMITTING THAT: Four words – invisible demon rape scene.