Apparently I’m An Actor And I Didn’t Know It

Check out this commercial (only watch first part or else your head may quite actually explode):

Now check out me:

In my pimping days

In my pimping days

Unless all kids looked the same back in the day… I was pretty good friends with Marzon.

Now it’s not like I haven’t acted before.  As I state in my Fact Sheet above, I was in Billy Crystal’s HBO meh-fest, “61*.”  Here’s a couple shots of me acting my chops out:

I played Guy Happy to be at Game #154

I played Guy Happy to be at Game #154

Upstaged by Marzon first; Mickey Mantle's grandson second

Upstaged by Marzon first; Mickey Mantle's grandson second

An opportunity recently presented itself to me, here in Michigan.  My talents are wanted yet again:

Hi,
We are looking for a Hand double for Adrien Brody’s hand.
If interested and available. please send a photo of your hand with your fingers spread apart on a flat surface.
Filming is in Howell, MI. Rate is $120.00 for 8 hours and overtime after 8.
Please include your name and phone number in your reply email. Please also provide your ring size if you know it.
Thanks.

All right… I’ll admit that it wasn’t sent directly to me, but I know my hands can do it.  They’re very good actors – trust me.  Hey, Marzon was a prima donna, and Mantle’s grandson forced me to feign excitement, like, six times. 

How difficult would it be to play Adrien Brody’s hands?  My hands can check the time.  Flip the pages of a book.  Type.  Make a sandwich.  Hold things.  Drop things.  Throw things.  Flick things.  Pet a co-star’s head.  I guess they could even caress a co-star’s breast, if needed.  *wink*wink*   (Although, I should double-check who’s in it.)  They can do anything!  (Except gut a fish.  Please don’t make them gut a fish.  Or hook a worm.  I have bad memories from my pimping days…)

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