Sienna Ya Later, Balthazar!

Does Britain have trailer parks?

Does Britain have trailer parks?

Oops!

“Lord of the Flies” star Balthazar Getty had a wife and four children.  One was a newborn.

The tornado that is Sienna Miller (a “Queen of the Flies,” you might say tongue in cheek… or ahem, something else in cheek) swept him away from his family earlier this year.

Now she has called it quits with him, blaming it on all the public scrutiny.  From Us Magazine:

I’m single at the moment, and I’m completely happy with that. It’s nice not to have a relationship that the press constantly want to scrutinise and discuss. I’m cool with being on my own.

Currently going down at ex-wife Rosetta Millington’s home:

Dragonbalthazar (outside front door): Honey, I’m home!
Rosetta: Who is it?
Nobalthazar: Your sugar puff, BZAR! (Seriously, this is tattooed on his knuckles.)
Rosetta: Go fuck yourself! Oh wait, you already did. Your great grandfather was billionaire oil tycoon Jean Paul Getty, right?
Sunkenbalthazar: Yes… Can’t we settle this already? Just let me in!
Rosetta: Oh, there will be a settlement all right.

Et cetera, et cetera… by the way, Sienna – you can break up my happy home anytime!  Isn’t she such an adorable natural disaster?

Advertisements

Fake Foreign Lisps Is The New Getting Hit In The Nuts

I have not seen “Madagascar.”  I will not see “Madagascar: Escape 2 the Same Continent That Madagascar is Part Of.”  I also have not and will not see “The Love Guru.”

Notice any similarties between these two clips other than the fact I want to put my head in a vice and hook one of those NASCAR bolt removers to its crank?