As given away in this entries title, this week celebrates the fifteenth anniversary of X-Men: The Animated Series, yet there’s nary a DVD in the works containing all the seasons. A few miniseries were released earlier this century (that sounds so long ago) as was the Juggernaut onto the TripleDoubleU (and deftly killed by the hackysack, Brett Ratner).
If not for Fox Cubs – I mean Kids – the show would have never seen the light of day (thanks Margaret Loesch!)
Some other shows that thankfully might NOT have seen the light of day if not for Fox Kits – I mean Kids:
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes: The Animated Series
Eek! The Cat
Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers (any version after Tommy became the White Ranger… and ALL COPYCATS…”Aye aye aye!”)
Incredible Crash Dummies
C Bear and Jamal
Godzilla: The Series
Kong: The Animated Series
The Mr. Potato Head Show
& ugh… I’m done…
Last night, as usual, the conversations danced around like the carbonation in the libations. Here’s a rundown of the lowdown in alphabetic order:
A -> Adult Diapers. Apparently, some people wear them to rock concerts so they don’t lose their spot. Discussion of wearing them to the bar any night reeked of laziness.
B -> b (the lower case letter). A malformed handwritten form of this letter prompted another to mention that it looked like a stick person’s foot. This prompted me to ask if “d” was the other foot.
C -> Cursive Writing.This sprung out of the “b” incident. Heated (lukewarm) debate began over capital F’s. Capital I’s, Q’s, X’s and Z’s were remembered fondly. (And conveniently.)
D -> Darts. The game was played. I never achieved Swiss Cheez athleticism (see S).
E -> ESPN. And their stupid show where people play Madden ’09. To borrow liberally from SNL (and specifically Seth and Amy), “Really?”
F -> F (see C)
G -> George and Ma’am. “Why do you call George, George, and me, Ma’am, instead of Katherine?” / “Because it’s close to Mom.” (see W – ha, like the channel!)
H -> Hole. Courtney’s “Celebrity Skin” was played on the digital jukebox, when we really wanted to play… (see V – ha, like the resume!)
I -> I (see C – ha, like Intensive Care Center… wait that’s not funny)
J -> “Jake’s Again.” Home of the delectable $3.25 CHEESEBURGER… IF ONLY I COULD CAPITALIZE THE $3.25
K -> Kan’t think of anything.
L -> Lions. Alex Karras played for them. He was married to Susan Clark. They were on a show together. (see W – not as funny the second time)
M -> Maverick. Not our ol’ GOP pals. The increbidle (I mixed up my left and right feet) ride at Cedar Point.
N -> Nope, nothing to see here.
O -> Olympic Figure Skating. Specifically – Men’s Figure Skating. Particularly – Brian Boitano, and whether he was Canadian or American. The argument found footing* in the South Park Movie because he did not have a flapping head. *(SIDENOTE: db <– regular footing; bd <– pigeon-toed, or shy, footing)
P -> Proposal 2. In Michigan, it’s about stem cell research, and the funding it gets. Fun ding? Funny!
Q -> Q (see C… for cop out)… No wait! Quints! We chatted about how the old toyline would prove to be an interesting costume.
R -> Relationships. I daydreamed my ideal situation – the woman would be beautiful and mysterious. She would belittle me almost everyday, but tell me she still cares about me. She’d disappear for days at a time and I’d go crazy, wondering about her, waiting for her return. When she’d come home, I’d question where she’d been. She’d get angry and threaten to leave me for good. I’d withdraw the question and find happiness once again in her arms. Ah, true love.
S -> Swiss Cheez. Normally, as an athlete or skilled competitor, I’m moderate at best. That’s me in the air pockets of the Cheez. But every once in awhile, I hit the Cheez and look out!
T -> Trivia. That’s why we were out ‘n about. Check out the details here.
U -> Universe. What we’re here for, and how everyone wants to be told what to do and to be like – but you can’t anyone that’s what they want.
V -> Violet. “Go on, take everything, take everything I want you to!”
W -> “Webster.” Two episodes I remember from this show: the time Webster thought his photography teacher stole his picture to win a magazine contest (they happened to take the same snapshot of a tree, but the winning pic had the teacher at the bottom of the frame!), and the other ‘sode had young Webster walking in on George and Ma’am getting busy. They told him they were “changing a lightbulb,” so when Webster’s friend (a girl) came over, they got nude to “change a lightbulb.” Kids!
X -> X (see C… for cheap)
Y -> You had to be there.
Z -> Z (see C, si?) No, wait… Zenith. Did you know they created the first remote control?
It’s kinda dumb. The image makes me think of a less x-treme Surge:
EXTREME MINUS THE E WITH A HYPHEN… GRRRR!
So instead of a rant, I’ll fill you in on how I came to drink the antifreeze of the soda pop world.
My friend, Jay, used to be an avid drinker of Mt. Dew, but he always used to complain about how much it made him have to go pee. I didn’t believe that it could dew that, so I traded in my Faygo Cola for the green stuff, and I’ve never looked back (and my urinating patterns have never suffered nor changed either)…
It just turned out Jay was hypoglycemic, or hyper. It was one of those.
Today disgraced Detroit mayor, Kwame Kilpatrick, begins his 120-day jail sentence here (from the Freep):
Oh no! Not graffiti on the mirror!
Considering I’m an actual citizen of Detroit, and since I’m technically paying for his stay with my tax dollars (I think I am – I really don’t know much about things like that), I suggest we do this: play this song on loop the entire four months.
Update: My sister, Becky, helped me “uncover” one other toy.
With Halloween upon us, I feel it is my civic duty to challenge any or all of you ladies out there that are: A) creative and B) like to… sexy it up… (I was going to put “slutty it up,” but here I did anyway.)
Now let it be known, I’m all about nostalgia, and in addition to that, I’m for the sexification/sluttification of said nostalgia. I mean, isn’t that what Halloween is all about anyway… in a non-nostalgic way? (Maybe regular candy has evolved into eye candy.)
But here’s the challenge: we’ve all seen the Strawberry Shortcakes, Rainbow Brites, She-Ras, and Jems. I still have a fondness for Jabba Palace Leia (especially when there’s a bunch of them pillow fighting), and kudos to those ladies that work wonders as a Care Bear (whodathunk Grumpy could look cheery). What follows are my suggestions… my outside-the-(cardboard)-box starters, if you will.
To begin: how about Herself the Elf?
Full name: Herself Shortcake
Sure, she’s not too unlike any other fairies (goth girls, whut-whut!), but no one is going around proclaiming, “I’m Herself the Elf!” Another idea (and in this line there are plenty of options) – what about a Charmkin?
The bulk of the costume would be standard fare, but the kicker is the ring on your head with a giant charm necklace going through it. Can you imagine that? How about Blinkins?
I wanna say something about curtains and carpets...
You could even go as far as these guys and make your shell open up so you can hide inside. Another great venture would be the alternative to the two-man horse… the two woman My Little Pony. (Argue over whom gets which end!)
Also pictured: My Little Hair Brush
My last idea is by far not the least. My final challenge (and if anyone pulls this off send me pics) – Alf’s Melmacian lost love, Rhonda. I’ll leave the details to you.