Hibbidy-Wah?! Meet Colby – The Christian Robot

Whoawhoawhoawhoa… whoa.  Fuck this video.

  • That’s not a computer – that’s a robot.
  • If Colby is everyone’s friend as that one girl tells Nick (he’s a jerk!), then why did he need to get introduced at the start?
  • Not only is Colby programmed all the scriptures in the Bible, he doesn’t even know what a game is?
  • A two-parter – how can machines be “overweight” and why is Nick such a jerk?!
  • What kind of talking-out-of-your-ass line is this:

I must reorganize my files… they’re completely out of phase!

  • Praying never fixes anyone’s computer after a surge.  Changing a power supply might.
  • Why do all the kids talk SO LOUD?!
  • What the fuck are Flip and Flop, and why are the only ones that can fix Colby?  Does this mean they are greater than God, since He couldn’t do it?  Nope.  Their just a couple of dicks disks.
  • More out-of-your-ass talk:

Oh, I simply must reposition these files!

  • Who doesn’t have a pocket bible, raise your hand!
  • Have you ever seen a greater parallel to proselytizing than the robot song performed against Nick?  (Why would they trust a jerk alone with Colby, unless they knew Colby could indoctrinate him?)  Lyrics:

Kids: We are all robots, and you must be a robot, too!

Nick: I don’t wanna be a robot!

  • If you want to skip to the trip, jump to the 4:18 mark.

(via the un-terrible Everything is Terrible)

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