I was told by a coworker that may or may not be privy to my private fears to check out our local news website and see this:
I don't even have the ability to be funny right now (which could be argued either way)...
Apparently, some guy captured the image from up in his deer blind in Louisiana, and here’s salsa dog:
SRSLY LOL
Well, maybe a lil’ LOL for the pup.
I thought the guy that sang this song…
…was the same guy that sang this song…
Boy, was I sure confused.
So no more walking on the wild side.
But typing on the wild side is still okay.
How this made it to market I'll never know...
I don’t want to call this one a “phone-in”… perhaps it could be called a “dial-up”…
I found this site Access Main Computer File that collected screen caps from many flicks that contained computer displays, so I stole five, gave them credit for it, and made a So, Duh! Pop Quiz.
See if you can guess which cinematic masterpiece these masterpc‘s came from.
If you need an example, here’s one:
This is from Witches of Eastwick, right?
Anyweblog, let’s begin.
1)
2)
3)
4)
5)
(Answers after the jump) Read More
Don’t know what to get that special lady in your life? (And I’m not talking about your mom.) Then look no further than these brilliant Awful Battle ideas!
First up – when costume jewelry is just too cheap and gaudy, then it’s time to upgrade to Charmed Memories from Kay Jewelers:
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If bejeweled scrap metal doesn’t quite carry the weight you’d hope (and they do look heavy), howzabout you help her hide the weight with Kymaro Body Shapers:
(SIDENOTE: Don’t you think this simulation is pushing it?)
This reminds me of Arnie and DeVito in "Twins" for some reason.
This last idea might not just be for the ladies. It’s the Trojan’s Tri-Phoria vibrator, and… well, just watch and witness the groom’s unfettered excitement (at the 52 second mark):
And for the record, what does Tri-Phoria have to do with euphoria? It’s not Deux-Phoria or Two-Phoria…
If I was in charge, I would have figured out a way to make it a quadruple vibrator (as opposed to a triple vibrator, however that works), and called it the – wait for it…
EuFOURia.
I had one of two pictures to begin this post with. I chose this:
(Please ignore the bubbles)
(SIDENOTE: The other is after the jump.)
I’ve long been a fan of the ol’ mouth organ harp, probably since I first heard it in Elton John’s I Guess That’s Why They Call It the Blues. But through all my years, use of the ol’ juicebox has been left out to dry.
Not since Blues Traveler’s Run-Around, their infinitely better song, Hook, and Alanis Morissette’s Hand in My Pocket has a song with a harmonica solo gone mainstream. John Popper and Alanis were topping the charts with those songs in 1994 and 95. That’s fifteen years without a prevalent Mississippi saxophone presence. Was it merely a mid-90’s thing?
Let’s look at earlier performances that included the tin sandwich:
The only recent hope that the Reckless Tram has had has been courtesy of Jack White (The White Stripes’ Hello Operator) and The Helio Sequences’ aptly named Harmonica Song:
Am I missing any? (I’m sure I am.) Is the instrument dead to the pop music scene? Can you imagine the likes of Katy Perry, Justin Beiber, or Ke$ha sliding a foreign metal instrument across their lips?
Maybe that’s a question for an entirely different subject…
Out of context, I have no idea what these two Actors! have in common. In context – I still don’t. That mostly has to deal with the fact that I was tipsy, but the mostly is barely a mostly, because I also never watched either of the shows these Actors! starred in.
CELEBRITY #1 – Jan-Michael Vincent
Star of "Airwolf"
CELEBRITY #2 – Philip Michael Thomas
Co-star of "Miami Vice"
The only explanation that comes to mind is:
"Nash Bridges" - Revelations
"Nash Bridges" - Out of Miami
As Dana Carvey’s Church Lady would always say:
Some others in the Three First-Namers Club:
I might confuse them one day by their hair or jackets.
(UPDATE: VIDEO FIXED!)
I rubbed my eyes with lemon juice. I squinted with toothpicks under my lids. I snorted some Habanero sauce. Salt was sprinkled onto my optical orbs, and nothing of what I had witnessed made any sense.
At first glance, you might mistake this video for an Insane Clown Posse one, based solely upon its production value, and you’d be right, except for the “clown” and “posse” part. Maybe “clown” is relevant.
This is a commercial for the Norwegian show called Golden Times. The way I wrote that sentence makes it sound like you should recognize it, so since you wouldn’t, I share it’s given name: Gylne Tider. Apropos of nothing, that’s an anagram for
DETER LYING
of which I am with these truths. So sit back, and
GENTLY RIDE
this strange ride on the TripleDoubleU that’s
LEGIT NERDY.
Without any further introduction, enjoy a slew (there has never been a better time to use this word) of random celebrities from the 80’s (and some 90’s) singing The Beatles’ Let It Be. By my guesstimation, I would venture to, um, guess that this was what probably what killed Leslie Nielson, you Norwegian bastards!
(SIDENOTE: As you watch, you’ll find yourself thinking the cast can’t get any weirder, and it always does. Also take note of what role each Actor! is recognized for. It adds even more fun.)
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This was one of those dreams that occurred between snoozes, so adjustments developed that expanded on the concept that follows. I contemplated not posting this on the site because I like the idea quite a bit, but then I realized – I’m not a Hollywood insider, and I’d have no way to get this into the proper hands (if it was even in script form).
Anysphinctersayswhat, here’s the premise to what began as simply Austin Powers 4: Agent Origin, and evolved into… well, here’s the poster:
(Not So) Artistic Representation
Following the events of Goldmember, upon discovering that Austin Powers and Dr. Evil were brothers, the pair hop into the time machine to explore where everything went wrong between them. This leads them to the post-World Wars 40’s.
Of course, Justin Timberlake would play the younger version of Michael Caine’s Nigel Powers, and they’d uncover the origin of Austin’s “Mojo.”
They quickly learn that it was the freshly evil Scott Evil (Seth Green) that raised Dr. Evil to be evil. He left the present time as soon as they did to unleash his ultimate evil plan of pitting the brothers against each other.
So as they seek to change the past, they find themselves time travelling to the 50’s (where Scott picks up his new sidekick, the super dog and Russian ex-patriot, Laika), and eventually the 80’s to when Scott was born.
Of course everything works well, but the specifics… well, I didn’t dream those, and until Hollywood comes calling, I ain’t saying. Maybe.
If you’ve ever seen the film version of the beloved comic strip Marmaduke, I’m sorry then you’re well aware of all the obvious anti-white sentiment sprinkled throughout.
Oh, you didn’t notice it? Then I’ll let Andrew of The Andrew Show enlighten you, emphasis on lighten, with a dash of a speech impediment:
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To clean your palette, howzabout some Baby Inception:
monkeyBLOG monkeyDO 
