If you’re unclear on the concept of what a hipster is, hopefully this infographic can be of assistance:
If it didn’t help, whatever man.
Anywhohasntshoweredallweekend, I should have heard of Pomplamoose before my boss/friend Paul did (mainly because he’s only recently “discovered” All-American Rejects, and he’s proud of that). As he perpetually asked me if I heard of Pomplamoose, I continually asked if it was a children’s group (he’s also a huge fan of The Wiggles).
So I looked them up, and I was shocked – SHOCKED! – that their videos have millions – MILLIONS! – of hits…
…and I never – NEVER! (really, again?) – heard of them.
Their YouTube channel is here… if you’re into hipster musicians, style circa 2004 or 2007, that is.
You may not have ever heard of Lukasz Gottwald, a.k.a. Dr. Luke, a.k.a. DJ Douche (not really), but you’ve certainly heard his work.
But I’m not here to celebrate him (if you can already tell), but to tell-all and make you aware of the source of his “artistry” as a writer and producer.
The latest is a minor tussle over whether Britney Spears’ new song, Hold It Against Me, rips off The Bellamy Brothers’ If I Said You Had a Beautiful Body. In this case, I say no (as do others), but it’s not the first time good ol’ Dr. Luke’sskillz have been called into question.
Avril Lavigne’s Girlfriend / The Rubinoos’ I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
Daughtry’s Feels Like Tonight / The Asphalt’s Tonight
If you skip to the 1:04 mark, you’ll notice the chorus is awfully similar to this. Read more about this one here.
Pink’s U + Ur Hand / The Veronicas’ 4ever
Ke$ha’s Tik Tok / Katy Perry’ California Gurls
He’s not even above ripping himself off. And Justin and Jessica Q. Public still lap it up.
Sure, there’s plenty more originals in his repertoire than copies – even a few that I like – but something has to be done to stop this mad man. Never forget he allowed THIS to happen.
IN CLOSING:
I realize that Dr. Luke’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Let’s just call him disappearing from the music scene my Teenage Dream. He is who he is, and We R Who We R. Not even Magic nor Dynamite could get rid of him. We could go Right Round in circles as the hours Tik Tok away, but ultimately I guess he’s here For Your Entertainment, and not mine.
It’s not like I’m Your Daddy or anything, but I want you to know that I’ll Keep Holding On to the notion that I know what’s best for you. Who Knew any of this would be such a big deal? Behind These Hazel Eyes (they really are hazel) is a man who respects the arts and thinks that stealing (“liberally borrowing“) without acknowledging it is wrong.
I just fear that one day, when Dr. Luke is no longer practicing his medicine, I won’t find myself saying, “Since U Been Gone, My Life Would Suck Without You.” Or something akin to that. Does that come across as fickle? A little con then pro, nay then yay, Hot N Cold? Maybe. But if I finally admit today that his music’s not all that bad, Feels Like Tonight might be the night I finally say, “I Kissed a Girl.”
And hopefully that same girl won’t notice my toupée and say, “Take It Off…”
This could have just as easily fallen under a Musical Musing post, but the obscure cross-section of music I’ve heard while in Prague honestly makes me say, Hibbidy-Wah?!
Some of these took a fair amount of research to uncover. Some… I quite readily knew. Hey! Howzabout we have a So, Duh! Pop Quiz Pop Quiz. See if you can guess which artists I knew, and which ones I didn’t. Those answers will be after the jump.
1) Mike + the Mechanics’ All I Need Is a Miracle (amazingly, we heard this more than once)
2) The Climax Blues Band’s I Love You (I was going to look for a better video, then I realized this could not be topped)
3) Air Supply’s Sweet Dreams (I was wrong… the above video could be topped)
4) Genesis’ Man on the Corner (what a creepy song, eh?)
5) Bryan Adams’ Straight From the Heart (this is a video masterpiece… not only does it represent the Czech’s affection for How I Met Your Mother, but also how important apostrophes are)
(Did you guess if I guessed right? Did you care?) Read More
Parents just don't understand... that I used to be a rapper!
Thank the New Years Baby (and this post on NY Mag’s Vulture) that I don’t have to figure out all the rappers turned Actors! and their levels of success crossing over. In a nutshell, from most Actor! to least Actor!, I present their list (which is worth checking out):
Will Smith
Marky Mark
Queen Latifah
Ice Cube
Common
Ice-T
Mos Def
50 Cent
Tupac
Ludacris
Drake
Snoop Dogg
Eminem
Sure, this list missed plenty of others, such as:
LL Cool J – “NCIS: Los Angeles,” Any Given Sunday
Xzibit – Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, xXx: State of the Union
T.I. – Takers, ATL
DMX – Cradle 2 The Grave, Exit Wounds
Ja Rule – Assault on Precinct 13, The Fast and the Furious
Oh wait, and there’s also:
Bow Wow – Lottery Ticket, Like Mike
André 3000 – Four Brother, Be Cool
Big Boi – Idlewild, Who’s Your Caddy?
Method Man – “The Wire,” How High
Redman – Seed of Chucky, How High
Damn. That list didn’t help as much as I thought. I found ten more on my (sorta) own.
Anywhooptiewoon****wut, that being said, how many rockers can you name?
Jon Bon Jovi (Pay It Forward, U-571)
Gene Simmons (Extract, Runaway)
Chris Isaak (Silence of the Lambs, Married to the Mob)
Mick Jagger (Freejack, Ned Kelly)
Joan Jett (Light of Day)
…Neil Diamond? (The Jazz Singer)
It’s a fairly scant list with not a large catalog behind them. What if you add in huge popular stars?
Elvis Presley (a bunch of films)
Frank Sinatra (Manchurian Candidate)
Madonna (Evita, Despertely Seeking Susan)
Barbra Streisand (Little Fockers, Funny Girl)
Cher (Moonstruck, Mask)
Prince (Purple Rain, Under the Cherry Moon)
Diana Ross (The Wiz, Lady Sings the Blues)
Mariah Carey (Precious, Glitter)
Janet Jackson (Poetic Justice, Why Did I Get Married?)
And the ingenues?
Britney Spears (Crossroads)
Jessica Simpson (The Dukes of Hazzard, Employee of the Month)
Mandy Moore (Tangled, Saved!)
Christina Aguilera (Burlesque, Shark Tale)
Avril Lavigne (Over the Hedge, Fast Food Nation)
Ashanti (Coach Carter, John Tucker Must Die)
Aaliyah (Romeo Must Die, Queen of the Damned)
…oh yeah, and…
Justin Timberlake (The Social Network, Alpha Dog)
And finally, I can’t forget about country folk and the rest:
Dolly Parton (Nine to Five, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas)
Harry Connick, Jr. (P.S. I Love You, Hope Floats)
Dwight Yoakam (Sling Blade, Red Rock West)
Travis Tritt (The Cowboy Way, Fire Down Below)
Let’s add all that up (correctly assuming I’ve missed much):
23 rappers
6 rock stars
9 pop stars
8 ingenues
4 country stars
Quite the spread. My theory on why this is happens to be the same reason why comedians can cross into acting easier than Actors! can become comical…
Their day job is a lot harder.
In other words, it’s like asking a heart surgeon to bring in shopping carts.
I don't think this guy could bring in shopping carts...
Natalie Portman has held her lofty position as Queen of the Nerds for a considerable amount of time, but be aware that Olivia Wilde is not merely standing by, waiting on the sidelines.
Whereas Ms. Portman garnered our nerds attention with her portrayal of Padmé Amidala (the original queen) in the Star Wars prequels, Ms. Wilde is picking up steam by portraying an isomorphic algorithm named Quorra (true story) in Tron: Legacy.
Let the Awesome Battle begin!
Both film series are fanboy favorites, and their female leads looked remarkable in them. But a long-awaited prequel trilogy and a belated sequel does not a battle make.
Ms. Portman followed up her Darth Vader-inspiring role with one from an underground comic book: V for Vendetta.
Ms. Wilde will be following up her Sam Flynn-inspiring role with one from an underground comic book: Cowboys & Aliens.
Ms. Portman then wasted a few years to become an Actor! It worked, because she’s getting a lot of award attention for her work in Black Swan. But in this time, her geekdom luster has lost its shine, and opened the path for Ms. Wilde to take her throne.
On the slate for each actress:
Ms. Wilde – an ensemble comedy about butter-carving competitions called Butter
Ms. Portman – an ensemble comedy about wizards and dragons called Your Highness
Ms. Wilde – a sci-fi adventure written and directed by Gattaca’s Andrew Niccol called Now
Ms. Portman – a rom-com directed by the once great Ivan Reitman and starring, ugh, Ashton Kutcher called No Strings Attached
Luckily for Ms. Portman. she’ll be in next summer’s big-screen treatment of the Marvel Comic,Thor, but Ms. Wilde is set to star in a new body-switching movie called The Change-Up, co-starring Ryan Reynolds and Jason Bateman, whom are also dork heroes.
In closing, I’ll share a comedy bit each of them made, and I’ll let you search for their nudescenes. This is a classy blog, folks, not an assy one.
I was driving to pick my buddy up at his new place the other day, and I found myself daydreaming as I was passing through a well-known speed trap. I’ve trained my eyes to catch cops by the side of the road, and this occasion was no different, hence my rapid deceleration. By the time, I looked at my speedometer, it was reading 53, 52, 51…
I was in a 45 MPH zone, and I knew I was going way faster than I should. I’ll pulled quickly onto the angled embankment between the bridge and the freeway entrance below it. My hands were displayed promptly empty out the window as the officer approached the passenger side.
I rolled the window down on that side and placed my hands on the steering wheel. He said,
This your ride?
I answered, “It’s mine.”
Can I see your license?
I answered, “I was waiting to get it safely.” It was then I dug out my wallet.
You were going 58 in a 45. How’s your driving record?
I told him it was good, even though it wasn’t long ago I was pulled over for something*.
Then I’ll take care of you.
I ended up getting an impeding traffic ticket which still costs $116, but… no points.
Ah, the part I’ve dreaded. I was daydreaming, listening to this song:
I was trying to figure out the line:
You made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter
Because this later line confused me:
I fell in love with a careless man’s careful daughter
I thought all the choruses went that way, but it was only the last one that “the boy” is singing to her.
Nonetheless, what makes this a Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? is that (My Boss) Paul pointed out that the cadence (which also happens to be his daughter’s name) is Taylor Swift’s Mine is almost the same as The Wallflowers’ One Headlight:
*That something I was pulled over for… I only had one headlight.
Mostly everyone nowadays knows Clarence Carter for his song, Strokin’. If the blind blues singer is known for anything else, it should be at least for the hook from his song, Backdoor Santa. Run-DMC “borrowed” the back beat for their better-known Christmas in Hollis, but here’s the original:
Awesome, right? It’s definitely sexual in nature, butt am I wrong to think it could be about a little something extra under the tree? I known the TripleDoubleU has been around for quite some time and my purest thoughts are no different from yellow snow, butt I don’t think I’m reading too much into these lyrics:
I’m your
Backdoor Santa
I make my run
At the break of day
“The break of day” is also known as “the crack of dawn.”
I ain’t like
Old Saint Nick
He don’t come
But once a year
That part is obviously sexual, and the concept was stolen by Pierce Brosnan’s James Bond. Here’s where it gets really interesting…
I kept that door open
In case anyone
Smelled a mouse
monkeyBLOG monkeyDO 
