Hibbidy-Wah?! Amazon Banana Slicer Amazingness!

Initially, I was going to write about this bath salts warning video, but upon finding out about this, I couldn’t resist…

THE HUTZLER 571 BANANA SLICER

This is the original picture. Wait for the "original pictures."

This is the original picture. Wait for the “original pictures.”

Apparently, many people have taken great joy in usurping this product’s listing on Amazon.  You can check it all out here, but these are some highlights:

CUSTOMER IMAGES

All my bananas curve the wrong way to use the slicer. (CAPTION FROM SITE)

All my bananas curve the wrong way to use the slicer. (CAPTION FROM AMAZON)

Minds blown... (CAPTION FROM AMAZON)

Minds blown… (CAPTION FROM AMAZON)

Great product, but don't get it mixed up with the banana! (CAPTION FROM AMAZON)

Great product, but don’t get it mixed up with the banana! (CAPTION FROM AMAZON)

CUSTOMER REVIEWS

Mine didn’t come with instructions, so I’m returning it. Also, call me when they make one that gives you smaller slices. -Pen Name

No more winning for you, Mr. Banana! For decades I have been trying to come up with an ideal way to slice a banana. “Use a knife!” they say. Well…my parole officer won’t allow me to be around knives. “Shoot it with a gun!” Background check…HELLO! I had to resort to carefully attempt to slice those bananas with my bare hands. 99.9% of the time, I would get so frustrated that I just ended up squishing the fruit in my hands and throwing it against the wall in anger. Then, after a fit of banana-induced rage, my parole officer introduced me to this kitchen marvel and my life was changed. No longer consumed by seething anger and animosity towards thick-skinned yellow fruit, I was able to concentrate on my love of theatre and am writing a musical play about two lovers from rival gangs that just try to make it in the world. I think I’ll call it South Side Story. Banana slicer…thanks to you, I see greatness on the horizon. -SW3K

I’m SO glad Hutzler came out with a plastic, dishwasher-safe version with this model (571). Finally! A banana slicer that’s TSA approved for airline travel in your carry-on luggage. With baggage-check fees being so high, I try to avoid checking bags whenever possible, but I just couldn’t travel without my (360-series) stainless steel banana slicer. But now, problem solved!!!! Travel with the plastic 571 version and no checked-baggage fees! No more having to use coffee stirrers from the hotel coffee service to slice my breakfast banana! You can even use it in-flight if you remember to buy a banana from Starbucks before you board. This will be perfect for our trip to Ecuador this summer!!!! Would have gotten 5 stars if it came with a carrying case to keep it clean. -Chryssa Jones

Waiting for 671 to buy. Need one of these *very badly* but anxious that as soon as I buy one… the next model will be out, what with all the new features and such. Don’t know if it is worth the wait, or if I will be disappointed with my 571 when all my friends have the 671? any thoughts? -rrrabbitt “rrrabbitt”

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