kevin smith

Musical Musings… Danke Schoen, John Hughes (For The Memories)

Posted on by sgottahurt

Passed Away After 59 Candles

Passed Away After 59 Candles

An 80’s staple and a 90’s thumbtack (and a 2000’s bottle of correction fluid), filmmaker John Hughes was influential (Kevin Smith and Judd Apatow site him as such), omnipresent (he released at least two pictures a year for awhile there), and iconic (see below). 

For those that grew up with his films, the majority of his earlier works stand out in our memories mostly because of the songs associated with them.  With his passing at the age of 59, let’s synch up his celluloid hits and misses with their synonymous Billboard hits and misses.

MOVIES NAMED AFTER SONGS

MOVIES THAT HAD MEMORABLE THEME SONGS

I know there’s plenty of other tunes in his movies to choose from (such as Danke Schoen and Twist and Shout for example), but these are the most direct songs associated with these films.

Thank you, Mr. Hughes, for the fond memories.  Not so much so for the Flubbers.

(P.S. You were thisclose to being featured in one of my The Sh– To Just Sh–ty posts.  Bullet dodged, my friend.  Farewell, and well done…)

JusWondering… Flooded Bathrooms, Head Sizes, Spasms, And Dirty Words?

Posted on by sgottahurt

Just some things I’ve been thinking about the last 24 hours:

  • At the bar last night, someone left a faucet running.  It filled the sink and started flooding the floor.  I turned it off and alerted the waitstaff.  The waitress’ response, “Not again.”  This made me wonder: Are we so used to automatic water faucets that we don’t remember how to use the old ones?
Now... you grab what and pump how again?

Now... you grab what and pump how again?

  • I get an occasional twitch in my left thigh where my cell phone usually hangs around.  Should I change the pocket I carry my cell phone in?
  • I used to be pretty good at math, and I’ve always loved board games.  People used to tell me I should have went into statistics, but I thought that would have been boring.  Maybe I should have invented some new kind of puzzle game.
  • Brit pop star Lily Allen has a new CD out.  Kevin Smith’s latest movie just came out on DVD.  While I was at Target, I looked at the back of Lily’s CD and saw that she had a song called “Fuck You,” clear as day on the back.  Yet, Zack and Miri couldn’t have Make a Porno on it.  So a “Fuck You” on your back is better than a “Porno” on your front?
    "What's a p****, mom?" "A p**** is a video of people fucking, honey."

    "What's a p****, mom?" "A p**** is a video of people fucking, honey."

  • This song I heard on the radio last night as I was driving home reminded me of discovering new music in my college years:
  • Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist would have been better if Nick and Norah’s heads were in proportion to each other.  I’m not sure if Michael Cera’s head is too small or Kat Dennings’ chest head is too big.  (I’m thinking the prior.)
    Made me not-so-afraid of NYC... I watch too many 70's movies.

    Made me not-so-afraid of NYC... I've seen too many 70's movies.

In My Brain While Sleeping… “Ice, Bots, Heroes, and Ho’s”

Posted on by sgottahurt

It begins in a factory in subzero conditions, and the plant crumbles around me.  Equipment fails.  Alarms… alarm.  In the distance, there are booming explosions and metal screams as it tears apart.  There are three of us – the remaining workers – and we’re trying to escape.  At an elevator platform that runs up an icy slope to freedom, we realize only two go at once.  The largest worker, easily twice the size of me, sends the third guy and myself first.  “I’ll be right behind you,” he bravely states as he mans the controls that send us up the slope.

Halfway up, the lift suddenly shrieks to a stop.  It begins heading back down.  We yell to our portly hero, wondering what’s happened, but we quickly realize we’re approaching our demise.  The source of the factory’s destruction has found us; his intent is to killl.  His name – Bender.  (Yes, the robot from “Futurama.”)  It turns out I’m in an episode of “Futurama.”  (A very special episode, I guess.)

Cut to me watching the show in some seedy Downtown Anywhere bar with Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith (or Jay and Silent Bob, if you will… I’m unsure which incarnation they were in).  We’re discussing the headquarters of our local superheroes, the Pantheon, and how it has no discernable entrance, but all the heroes know how to get in.  Kevin-slash-Silent Bob (so maybe it was Kevin because he was chatty… but then again Silent Bob does have his moments) brings up the architecture outside of the heroes’ HQ.

“Have you noticed that over the years, the smaller the heroines’ tops get, the bigger the pillars seem to get?”

After kicking back a few more drinks, and I assume finishing the “Futurama” episode, we hit the streets.  The three of us are about to veer left when two ladies in skimpy black-and-red plastic outfits approach from the right.  They call out J&SB, so I keep walking.  I meet an old lady at the corner who abruptly and repeatedly asks me, “Are those ho’s superheroes or prostitutes?”  I continue walking home.

INGREDIENTS: four day old Hungry Howies pizza, Double Stuf Oreos, and organic milk, mixed with winning our softball game as well as Tampa Bay’s victory over Boston (boo-ya!), sprinkled with the softball team playing a punching arcade game at the bar.