I would have sworn that Amazon was not new to the TripleDoubleU, but apparently hiding in their warehouses, there isn’t a single pervert to be found.
Scratch that. That’s exactly where they’re to be found.
It’s the head honchos and the hardware and software developers that didn’t think this Mayday Button through:
Haven’t they ever heard (even a whisper) of ChatRoulette? Those poor workers at Kindle support are in for a surprise. But then again, maybe pervs don’t own Kindles. Hopefully that doesn’t turn out to mean:
NOT OWNING KINDLE = PERVERT
Because then I’d need to go buy a Kindle. But if I bought a Kindle now, after having this idea, I’d look like a perv. Maybe I’ll just FaceTime a stranger for their openis– er, opinion!
I know this is everywhere so why not here!
SIDENOTE: For reference…
BONUS SIDENOTE: Too bad William Shatner is Canadian, otherwise SHATNER 2016!
As a brand new uncle to a brand new nephew, I cannot approve of this nutty toy line:
Perhaps my mind is too far in the gutter
balls. What a bunch of junk.
This 42″ tall playset gets a definite YES! from me.
There are plenty of geeky things to get to today. So let’s start with the big one.
J.J. Abrams has been confirmed as the director of Star Wars Episode VII. Be ready for fanboy battles to reach all new levels. Can the director of Star Trek pull off the switch? Considering he was raised suckling the hairy teat of George Lucas, I wouldn’t worry. Plus, this might pave the way for Joss Whedon directing Episode VIII. (No logic for that statement… only hope and speculation.) The only downside – a Damon Lindelof rewrite of Lawrence Kasdan and Michael Arndt’s finished script. Fuck you, LOST!
Two of my favorite newer shows are
getting cancelled! Ben and Kate and Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23 have officially received the ax. Hopefully they receive a DVD release – I don’t think I’m ax-ing for much. At least they’re in good company. Some of my highest recommendations lasted only one or two seasons – Wonderfalls, Pushing Daisies, Freaks & Geeks, Action, Profit, Undeclared, Jericho, and Firefly. (Veronica Mars, Deadwood, and Arrested Development got three.) P.S. I’m still waiting for my Sons and Daughters and Warren the Ape DVD’s!
Two cool video games I’ll buy and never play: LEGO Marvel Super Heroes and Pokémon X and/or Y!
NO! OR MAYBE YES?
Django Unchained toys came out, and that’s a baaaaaad idea. A good idea would have been buying them, though. They’re selling for upwards of $500 each (though I’m not sure what they started out at, I’m sure they were under $50). An entire set went for $6000 on eBay! Why are my feelings so conflicted right now?!
Just in time for Christmas Eve, I’ve assembled a list of containing A Handful Of items I may actually want, even though I told all my loved ones not to buy me anything because I didn’t buy them anything. Will they listen this year? Hopefully. But they haven’t yet, and I feel like a real dick when they do. Unless that’s what they wanted. Then they did get a gift from me after all!
So you can keep warm while looking cool.
I missed it when this Marc Ecko product had its original run, but aren’t we living in the age of the TripleDoubleU?! Anything’s possible! But probably not
buy by tomorrow…
This game looks just like you’re playing the TV show. Do you know how many times I’ve wished Friends would have done that? Oh, and I should mention this – I would like the 360 pre-order version so I can get Mysterion. So what if this doesn’t come out until next year. I can wait.
I will not name him Tony.
I was just telling my brother the other day that I have three loves in this world:
- Taco Bell
The other two are kind of off-point, but this little robot would be a nice beginning for my impending robot-infested dominion.
Final words before my inevitable incarceration: “See you all later… you know, because I was secretly video taping you.”
My sister actually brought these to my attention, and they haven’t left my consciousness since. I brought up the possibility of getting these to a few friends, and one deftly responded: “Creepersville.” My initial interest was genuine – wear this to bars to capture conversation flows or to a soccer game to get a first-person perspective of my awfulness. But it’s there – right on the fringe of Creepersville no matter my intent. The only other inevitable problem is that I have enough difficulty living in the moment as it is. With these, I’ll be living in perpetual time-delay.
Nothing like a little Regenerate to improve your complexion.
If you’re unaware of the Umbrella Corporation, here’s a sampling of one of their products:
In reality, it’s a youth-restoring product invented for a movie/video game series involving zombies. Or is it?
A little Regeneration, I mean, Meaningful Beauty goes a long way.
If it’s not that
shit stuff, then how about this stuff shit?
Why does Justin Bieber have a perfume?
Want to be grossed out? Guess how much bacteria exists in the average human body?
The human body carries more than 100 trillion bacteria – up to five pounds of the tiny single-celled organisms.
Together, all of the bacteria in the body would be the size of a large liver, and in many ways, scientists say, the microbiome behaves as another organ in the human body.
So… the amount of bacteria in EACH OF OUR BODIES roughly equals this:
How about this?
Maybe this will bring it home:
I’ll admit it. I watch Cartoon Network. That’s where I catch all the latest Clone Wars episodes (not for much longer, though).
It’s also where I catch-up on the latest and greatest toy offerings. Of all the dumb things I’ve seen, I couldn’t believe that this (post from two years ago) has officially made its way here:
This toy from Britain?
Or this one from 1991?
(SIDENOTE: Wow. That song is not catchy at all.)
I don’t find this particularly exciting, so I’m not sure why I’m writing about it. This probably has more to deal with the fact that I noticed the odd trend, and I want to share it with you. As you mill over the new logos of three companies, take notice of how similar their new fonts are. While you’re doing that, I think of a way to spice this blog entry up…
Okay… I’ve had moments to think. Howzabout we try this:
A HANDFUL OF… TERRIBLE BOARD GAMES FOR KIDS
- Hot Dog in a Hallway – It’s similar to Hungry, Hungry Hippos, except you shoot Tic Tac-sized plastic hot dogs down a motorized hallway playset that has moving walls like in the movie Labyrinth. Whoever gets the most hot dogs down their hallway wins!
- Last Call – It’s like the game of Life, except your goal is score someone’s number before the clock hits 2:00 am!
- Happy Endings – It’s like Candyland, except you’re on the interstate freeway system, looking for illicit massage parlors. Don’t get stuck in the Lot Lizard pit!
- Bed Bugs – It’s like – oh… yeah, this exists.
- Othello – It’s like Reversi, except you change the name because:
The name was selected as a reference to the Shakespearean play Othello, the Moor of Venice, referencing the conflict between the Moor Othello and Iago, who describes himself as “two-faced” and more controversially, to the unfolding drama between Othello, who is black, and Desdemona, who is white. The green color of the board is inspired by the image of the general Othello, valiantly leading his battle in a green field [or because jealousy is the green-eyed monster – Ed.]. It can also be likened to a jealousy competition (jealousy being the central theme in Shakespeare’s play), since players engulf the pieces of the opponent, thereby turning them to their possession (via Wikipedia)…
Well, that saves me the hassle of Photoshopping those games!
*dusts off hands*