Happy Find… Places You Don’t Bring A Baby

snuffx-dot-com-microwave-baby

"I can heat up the formula AFTER she drinks it, right?"

I am not a father.  But after reading Places You Don’t Bring A Baby, I think I’m ready to be one.  It’s an excellent guide for those uniformed about how to be a normal human being.  You know… the type that doesn’t STICK THEIR KID IN A MICROWAVE or BRING A TODDLER TO A BACHELOR PARTY?  These are just two examples.  There are many more at the site.

BTW, heaven help us all…

baby_at_bachelor_party

"Man wears camouflage to hide from Child Services"

Hibbidy-Wah?! Belgium – Where Teletubbies Are Dicks

neveneffecten

Neveneffecten is like the Kids In The Hall of Belgium (Kids In The Hall is like Monty Python's Flying Circus of Canada)

This video will not be on the front page.  I features an excitable wang dancing against a Windows XP backdrop.  It is a YouTube video so it’s not too profane, but it’s still NSFW (and Not Safe For Mind).

Courtesy of the above Belgium comedy troupe, Neveneffecten, they often spoof National Geographic videos on their absurdist show, emphasis on graphic.

Hopefully you can enjoy yourself as much as this penis appears to…

(video after the jump)

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InASense, Lost… Fetish Tots

Oh, hi.  I didn’t see you there.

I was about cook up a plate of Soylant Green before I sealed up the doors and windows.  We want to keep out those pesky vampires (or zombies… no one’s for sure).  The reason why I’m doing all this?  It’s because hell has arrived on Earth in the form of:

 

fetishtotslogo

Why is the theme to Rugrats stuck in my head?

Recently on display at the Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco, the company states via their website that product will be available Winter 2010.

Samples:

fetishtots2fetish-totsAll I have left to say is this: pack for cold weather.

We’re for damn sure heading to the coldest layer of Dante’s Inferno.

I’ll be joining everyone else as soon as I finish eating this old person sandwich.

(more here at Something Awful)

Hibbidy-Wah?! Humanimals Creep Me The F— Out

With Halloween upon us (and the one year anniversary of this blog’s creation – woohoo!), I’ve recently made a purchase in preparation for the slew of parties coming up.

Usually, there’s not a slew (and only one that may or may not be hosted by me), and usually, I have the energy to make my own costume out of cardboard.  Not so this year!

Without giving anything away, like mentioning I picked up a gorilla costume at Target, for example, I fear I might have dunked my toe into the pool of weirdness that is these folks: Humanimals.

Your glory is that I couldn’t pick just one…

(click for more after the jump)

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JusWondering… What Do These Cell Phone Notes Mean?

It’s been awhile since I’ve checked out the notes on my old phone (mostly because I’ve since purchased a new phone), but I was going through transcribing the tips and ideas.  I understood most.  These left me clueless:

  1. loren lion
  2. stat based
  3. rhett butler flog
  4. phlattline.com
  5. face movie pix
  6. 2 24th cleo arrest
  7. kangaroo
  8. barely hear my own horn

First off, loren lion. Was this a clever name I feared I would forget?  Was it a particular lion I needed to look into?  Maybe the answer was based in statistics.

Why I put this:

flog

With this guy:

rhettbutler

Might make my brain phlattline.com.

Face movie pix could have been an invention, or a story idea, or a… picture of faces in a movie?

I think the cleo arrest might have something to do with Miss Cleo getting arrested, but I don’t think she was ever incarcerated, 2 times, let alone a 24th time.

Um, yeah… he exists:

Yeah... whattaboutit?

Yeah... so whattaboutit?

And I guess it’s true: I can barely hear my own horn.  I’m glad I made a note of it.