Every once in a while, it’s nice to scoff at someone else’s misery mixup. I’m not free of confusion in this situation, but it involves my boss/friend Paul, and the group Supertramp.
First off, I was unaware they made The Logical Song…
…and, well I’ll get to the other song in a little bit.
One day, Paul burst into the office, convinced that the Goo Goo Dolls had ripped off one of Supertramp’s songs. He swore the end of one of their songs directly stole the ending, but he couldn’t remember which of either.
As I mentioned, I was only familiar with the above tune, so we scoured Goo Goo Dolls’ catalog on YouTube, skipping to just the end of almost all their hits. When we finally hit upon Give a Little Bit, Paul was elated that this was the song. Now we only needed to figure out the Supertramp song.
This will inevitably get taken down, but since it destroyed me emotionally as much as it lifted my spirits, I shall share it with you, as if you probably haven’t already seen it.
(SIDENOTE: I’ve never thought more highly of Steven Tyler than after this. Not that I thought highly of him beforehand…)
You may not have ever heard of Lukasz Gottwald, a.k.a. Dr. Luke, a.k.a. DJ Douche (not really), but you’ve certainly heard his work.
But I’m not here to celebrate him (if you can already tell), but to tell-all and make you aware of the source of his “artistry” as a writer and producer.
The latest is a minor tussle over whether Britney Spears’ new song, Hold It Against Me, rips off The Bellamy Brothers’ If I Said You Had a Beautiful Body. In this case, I say no (as do others), but it’s not the first time good ol’ Dr. Luke’sskillz have been called into question.
Avril Lavigne’s Girlfriend / The Rubinoos’ I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
Daughtry’s Feels Like Tonight / The Asphalt’s Tonight
If you skip to the 1:04 mark, you’ll notice the chorus is awfully similar to this. Read more about this one here.
Pink’s U + Ur Hand / The Veronicas’ 4ever
Ke$ha’s Tik Tok / Katy Perry’ California Gurls
He’s not even above ripping himself off. And Justin and Jessica Q. Public still lap it up.
Sure, there’s plenty more originals in his repertoire than copies – even a few that I like – but something has to be done to stop this mad man. Never forget he allowed THIS to happen.
IN CLOSING:
I realize that Dr. Luke’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Let’s just call him disappearing from the music scene my Teenage Dream. He is who he is, and We R Who We R. Not even Magic nor Dynamite could get rid of him. We could go Right Round in circles as the hours Tik Tok away, but ultimately I guess he’s here For Your Entertainment, and not mine.
It’s not like I’m Your Daddy or anything, but I want you to know that I’ll Keep Holding On to the notion that I know what’s best for you. Who Knew any of this would be such a big deal? Behind These Hazel Eyes (they really are hazel) is a man who respects the arts and thinks that stealing (“liberally borrowing“) without acknowledging it is wrong.
I just fear that one day, when Dr. Luke is no longer practicing his medicine, I won’t find myself saying, “Since U Been Gone, My Life Would Suck Without You.” Or something akin to that. Does that come across as fickle? A little con then pro, nay then yay, Hot N Cold? Maybe. But if I finally admit today that his music’s not all that bad, Feels Like Tonight might be the night I finally say, “I Kissed a Girl.”
And hopefully that same girl won’t notice my toupée and say, “Take It Off…”
I practically live in my car. I’m always driving somewhere (which is probably why I have no drive in the rest of my life). So I listen to the radio a lot. The following songs are those that will either make me change the station, or keep me flipping through the dial.
I thought about including the videos here, but that wouldn’t seem true to the reason behind this Musical Musing. At least I’ve included the links, so nyah.
Okay – scratch all that (I did). IF there is to be ANY humor in this list, it has to be in the reveal. A short list can’t duplicate what gobbled up real estate can.
To begin, I will never listen to Tool’s Schism. Sure, the video is creepy, and could have possibly been a part of my list for videos cooler than their songs, but it is way too long and tantamount to banging pots and pans in rhythm.
(SIDENOTE: I also cannot stand their song, Prison Sex. Actually, maybe I just don’t like Tool except for Sober.)
A lot of people don’t like Linkin Park already because, well, let’s just say a lot of their fans probably think Dane Cook is hilarious. But I’ve never minded them. I believe they work really hard at what they do, and when it works, it works for me. As for one of their latest, The Catalyst, it Dane Cooks.
This is an easy one that requires no explanation, but I do have one question… why is James Blunt’s early start to the song left in the final recording of You’re Beautiful? A better question… why do I care?
(SIDENOTE: James Blunt was supposedly in the army, and that baffled me until I found out he was British. Moving on…)
This shouldn’t even have made this list, but the opening piano riff (is that what it would be called?) lured me in a couple of times before I learned my lesson. That lesson: Miley Cyrus can’t sing, and The Climb should have never been on the radio. (What else do I think about Ms. Cyrus?)
And in closing, fuck NewSong’s The Christmas Shoes. If you haven’t heard it, consider yourself blessed. If you haven’t, you’ll have to click on the link. Or just hear Patton Oswalt explain the awfulness of it:
Once upon a time (in 1982 to be exact) there was a song. It was a power ballad of nuclear reactor proportions, and it went a little something like this:
Now you may argue…
I thought this was an Awful Battle? I love that song!
Don’t let nostalgia taint the reality that if that song was made today, it’d be laughable. Journey-ing on…
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Once upon another time (in 1986), there was another song. It was a remake of an older Randy Newman song that was featured in a little movie called 9.5 Weeks, or something like that. Again, if it was made today… well, I don’t know how many women wear hats that men would want them to keep on these days:
So why is it an Awful Battle? One hopes for endearment enduring, and one attempts to make this sexy:
It doesn’t happen often, but today I have some words of advice:
If you live in Detroit and you’ve had your house broken into twice, do not watch Detroit 1-8-7… it gave me a nightmare.
Luckily, I was able to fall back to sleep, but from now on I’m sticking with something positive, like MTV’s World of Jenks or The Buried Life. Here are the theme songs to each of the shows:
Kid Cudi’s Soundtrack 2 My Life from World of Jenks
Grits’ My Life Be Like (Ooh-Ahh) from The Buried Life
Someone once told me I would know The Grateful Dead’s Touch of Grey when I’d hear it after saying one time I didn’t know it. This happened a long time ago.
Well, I finally heard it. That person was right. I did know it. I just thought the song was by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers or the Travelling Wilburys or something else with Tom Petty in it.
But the funny thing I noticed was that it actually reminded me of something else. Here’s a refresher for you in case you don’t know or forgot it:
Hear the ding-ding-ding in the background? It sounds to me a lot like The Magic Store from The Muppet Movie:
At worst, it’s as similar as these two images:
I once made a joke at a Ben and Jerry's that their ice cream flavor shouldn't be Cherry Garcia, it should be Grateful Red. The girl behind the counter laughed. I didn't do anything else.
Talk about putting your foot in your mouth. No wait - scratch that.
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