Musical Musings… The Female Mind In The 80’s (According To A Swiss Duo)

I forgot all about this song until my good ol’ Sirius XM planted another earworm in my head.

It’s a song by Double about a woman that’s lost her love, and she still awaits his return.  What did she call him, or at least think of him as?  Wait for it… The Captain of Her Heart.

Only in the 80’s would a woman (even in a song written by two guys) consider her man the captain of anything.  Boats were weirdly popular, as were songs about sailing.  It was kind of a yuppie thing that even extended into fashion.

If this song was made in any other decade, I wonder what the hook would have been?


In the 70’s, it would have been The Yang of Her Yin.

In the 60’s, it would have been The Bread Winner of Her Children.

In the 50’s, it would have been Together Forever For Better or Worse.


In the 90’s, it would have been The Cock that Dicked Her Over.

In the Aughties, it would have been Rock That Booty on a Boat, featuring T-Pain.

In the 10’s, it would be The Captain of Her C—.

Hibbidy-Wah?! The 80’s Are Alive! (…In Prague!)

This could have just as easily fallen under a Musical Musing post, but the obscure cross-section of music I’ve heard while in Prague honestly makes me say, Hibbidy-Wah?!

Some of these took a fair amount of research to uncover.  Some… I quite readily knew.  Hey!  Howzabout we have a So, Duh! Pop Quiz Pop Quiz.  See if you can guess which artists I knew, and which ones I didn’t.  Those answers will be after the jump.

1) Mike + the Mechanics’ All I Need Is a Miracle (amazingly, we heard this more than once)

2) The Climax Blues Band’s I Love You (I was going to look for a better video, then I realized this could not be topped)

3) Air Supply’s Sweet Dreams (I was wrong… the above video could be topped)

4) Genesis’ Man on the Corner (what a creepy song, eh?)

5) Bryan Adams’ Straight From the Heart (this is a video masterpiece… not only does it represent the Czech’s affection for How I Met Your Mother, but also how important apostrophes are)

(Did you guess if I guessed right?  Did you care?) Read More

Musical Musings And Awful Battle… Decidedly Different 80’s Love Songs

Once upon a time (in 1982 to be exact) there was a song.  It was a power ballad of nuclear reactor proportions, and it went a little something like this:

Now you may argue…

I thought this was an Awful Battle?  I love that song!

Don’t let nostalgia taint the reality that if that song was made today, it’d be laughable.  Journey-ing on…


Once upon another time (in 1986), there was another song.  It was a remake of an older Randy Newman song that was featured in a little movie called 9.5 Weeks, or something like that.  Again, if it was made today… well, I don’t know how many women wear hats that men would want them to keep on these days:

So why is it an Awful Battle?  One hopes for endearment enduring, and one attempts to make this sexy:

No offense, Alexis.

Musical Musings… 80’s Songs That Throw Me Back

I once read somewhere that olfactory memories are the strongest (I don’t remember the specifics because I didn’t smell it), but I’d beg to differ.  In my opinion, songs provide the greater capacity to throw you back, and here are some 80’s songs that do.

For starters, movie themes are cheats, and Tears for Fears’ Everybody Wants to Rule the World is no exception, so much so that I also refer to it as the Real Genius song.  It always instantly conjures this image in my mind:

Everybody wants to butter the world.

For whatever reason, The Motels’ Only the Lonely always reminds me think of playing summer baseball.  My best guess as to the reason why?  I used to watch Casey Kasem’s America’s Top 10 (or some other show like that… I don’t remember because I didn’t smell it) before I’d ride my bike to the park.  As it is with most of these aural/cerebral connections… it’s best not to ask how or why.

I was only the lonely in right field.

This one’s an easy link up – Janet Jackson’s When I Think of You always makes me think of my first girlfriend, Brenda.  I was in the sixth grade; she was in fifth.  She was a cheerleader.  This was the song that her team (group?) performed to at the Pontiac Silverdome.  The odd memory attached to this?  The handled neon green comb I used to carry around with me to fix my spiked haircut:

It kind of looked like this, but more rounded and more neon green.

This one is a bit sentimental.  Joe Jackson’s Steppin’ Out always hurls me back to an early 80’s winter when I went ice fishing with my dad and his friends.

J. Geils Band’s Centerfold is about a man’s discovery of his childhood dream girl growing up and appearing in an adult magazine.  To me, it’s about summer camp and reading this:

My memory has just been sold... on eBay for $1.09.

Unfortunately, Bryan Adams’ Cuts Like a Knife also makes me think of comic books… except I was in college, driving around town in a burgundy Cadillac Brougham in a pony tail and trench coat, searching for back issues, listening to his greatest hits cassette, So Far So Good.

So far, so good, indeed.

Musical Musings… Attack Of The 80’s!

Is it just me, or does this song sound about thirty years too late?

Considering that’s the goal of singer La Roux, then job well done.  I was going to write more about them (they are a duo under the guise of a solo act), but I digress…

I wanted to shine some light on a memory this current song drudged up… ever hear of Swing Out Sister?

They don’t sound the same.  Usually when I post about two songs like this, I state that.  But in this situation I’ll admit that the synapses were bridged, and nothing more.

May either one or both get stuck in your head today.

So long.  Farewell.  Auf weidersehen.  Goodnight.  (How about that little ear worm for you?)