fix; informal term for a difficult situation; “he got into a terrible fix”; “he made a muddle of his marriage”; “Sandra Bullock’s in quite a pickle”
Hot off of an Oscar (and Razzie) win, Sandra Bullock has found herself on the butt-end of a debacle involving her husband, Jesse James, possibly having an affair with tattoo canvas, Michelle “Bombshell” McGee.
James’ former paramour and mother of his daughter, Janine Lindemulder, was also a fan of porn, well, watch this video and see…
Here’s some things I’ve picked up over the years and have never been able to put down. Well, that might be an overstatement. I could “put them down” in an insulting fashion, I’m sure. I was attempting clever word play, and I’ve thus succeeded in coming off as pretentious… nice going, d-bag.
POTSIE’S COUSIN “INVENTED” THE HEIMLICH MANEUVER
Would you associate these two images? On second thought, strike that question from the record.
Anson Williams, a.k.a. Potsie Weber from Happy Days, was actually a Heimlick. His second cousin was Dr. Henry Heimlich, the guy that named a move after himself. I have a few things to say about this strange fact I know:
I give credit to Happy Days as being the source of my taking an interest in the actual names of Actors! As a child, I remember being impressed by my parents ability to remember the characters’ real names, and I started paying attention to the, um, credits.
Can you really be, um, credited with the “invention” or “creation” of something that can be done manually? If that’s the case, then who invented the handshake? The noogie? The wet willie? (I bet Willie was the first person to get a saliva-coated finger shoved in his ear.)
Do you think Potsie was a precursor to the existence of Boner on Growing Pains?
EELS’ LEAD SINGER’S DAD ORIGINATED THE CONCEPT OF PARALLEL WORLDS
Remember this song?
If you didn’t, and you listen to it again, you now answer that same question differently. I’ve pulled your current consciousness from one plane of existence (where you did not remember that song), into this plane where you do. They both exist regardless of you decision. And that’s kind what Hugh Everett III (father of the guy in the above video, Mark Oliver Everett, or simply E) talks about in his theory (as far as I can understand it).
I’m not too amazed by this “discovery” though… some pot head (a.k.a. Potsie) would have thought it up sooner or later.
PAPA OF NURSE HATHAWAY – SORRY, THE GOOD WIFE – WROTE THE ALKA-SELTZER JINGLE
Once upon a time, she pushed George Clooney away.
No matter what Julianna Margulies will be in for the rest off her life, I’ll always think of her as Nurse Hathaway on ER. I bet the same thing can be said about her father, Paul, in relation to this earworm:
ONE OF THE MONKEES’ MAMAS MADE MISTAKE OUT
That one Monkee(s) happens to be Michael Nesmith. And Mistake Out is better known to us as Liquid Paper. I wrote about this before here.
AND THIS ONE I JUST LEARNED…
It’s not about kin, though… it’s just about one man… this man…
James Lipton in da howz!
Did you know he composed the theme song to Thundercats?!
I’ve stated before how awesome it is that you can teach babies to read. I might not have stated it on this site, seeing as how I can’t find any post that covered it, so you’ll just have to take my word for it.
But… I’m… beginning to have second thoughts about that…
…teaching kids, that is. Anything. Because then they grow up and become this:
The Buried Lifeis a rare treat on MTV… hell, make that TV in general.
It follows four Canadian friends as they embark on crossing items off of their bucket list. As they seek to accomplish their various feats, they also help others complete things they want to do before they die. It’s all quite positive.
This dream I had served as an origin story for the guys. One of them (I assume Dave) had this item on his list:
Freeze a microwave and then use it… like a reverse TV dinner.
I don’t know the steps involved in the process, but basically, he ends up blowing up the house. And that’s the reason they leave in their big purple bus, Bessie.
Another thing I can’t quite recall is what their first mission happened to be, but this image might give a clue about the first “person” they helped:
I wanted this to turn out better...
It was Launchpad McQuack, formerly of DuckTales and Darkwing Duck.
He was trying to find Gosalyn Mallard, adopted daughter of Darkwing Duck’s alter-ego, Drake. So the crew gathered in the bus and began the search.
"Look! There she is!"
There she is indeed.
DREAM INGREDIENTS: Bagels… with peanut butter on it.
The drinking implement is not important. The speed at which you drink is. If you drink more in a shorter space of time then yes, naturally. Pretty self-explanatory really.
This one was a two-parter: 1) As a kid, did I not watch M*A*S*H* because of the theme song?
Yes. It’s terrible.
2) Would I have liked it if it had a different theme song?
I don’t see why not.
Is “The Mike Game” a fun game to play?
Yes. Once you understand the complicated rules.
Somebody told me there was a Polish dog that was saved from an iceberg…
…and there was. They named him “Baltic”… you know, after the sea Polish fisherman found him on. I named my dog the same way!
The Opposite of a Hot Dog
Find the update on the situation here (and for an update on The Situation here). Now I’m going to go grab a beer and a straw, relax, and watch an old episode of Baywatch with my dog, “Outside the Strip Club.”
I’ve noticed a trend in sequels to popular films, and it’s one that I consider an exercise in lazy screenwriting. Heh… exercise… lazy…
Anywheredidshego, where did she go? To me, the writers couldn’t develop the characters’ relationships further, so they broke them in order to fix them again, to varying degrees of suck-cess.
Bill Murray seemed to be with Sigourney Weaver at the end of Ghostbusters, and then she (well, her character Dana) went and had a baby with someone else.
Sure, Bruce Willis and Bonnie Bedelia wouldn’t have won couple of the year in Die Hard, but by Die Harder, they seemed to have worked out all their kinks. In Die Hard with a Vengeance, the kinks won.
Orlando and Kiera’s love Bloom-ed, um, Knightley in the first Pirates of the Caribbean. In the second, they didn’t get married and fought only to draw out a boring plot point for two films.
Nick Cage found whatever it was he found in the first National Treasure;Diane Kruger was his booby prize. Then repeat the above, but place a “2” before the semicolon.
The Night at the Museum sequel doesn’t even begin to explain what happened between Carla Gugino and Ben Stiller, just so they could get to (hot?) Amelia Earhart’s doppelgänger, Amy Adams. What is this movie really… Mannequin 3: Skies the Limit?
Actually, I’m going to carry on with my Night at the Museum tirade. It’s not like he’s Austin Powers or James Bond, picking up new ladies every flick…
Actually again, James Bond has loved Vesper Lynd for two movies so far. One can imagine that every woman he bangs from here on out would be in an attempt to mask his pain of loving her too much. He probably would still be with her if she didn’t, you know, die.
So in closing, writers do yourself a favor and imitate the always excellent Transformers series – instead of blowing the relationship up, blow shit up!
This shit is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S! Or at least it’s P-L-A-N-T-A-I-N-S!
From my understanding (which translates to “I just learned this”), Lady Antebellum has been a part of the music scene since 2007, but I’ve only recently heard about the group courtesy of their simple and catchy crossover hit, Need You Now. The group is composed of Charles Kelley, Dave Haywood, and Hillary Scott(pictured above), which makes the trio’s name no less strange. It’s two guys and one lady. And antebellum means pre-war so no further help there.
Like Lady Sovereign before them and Lady Gaga after them, perhaps their moniker was inspired by…
Lady BIRD Johnson – former First Lady and husband to President LBJ (not to be confused with the president of LJN)
Lady VOLUNTEERS or“Sympathy for Lady VENGEANCE” – one’s a college basketball team from Tennessee and the other is a South Korean film… the ball’s in your court to decide which is which…
Lady XOC orLady XIN – a Mayan queen and a smart Chinese woman (insert sexist joke here)
Lady YANG – she was a Chinese consort, princess, and Taoist nun… in other words, she stayed busy…
Lady ZEP, Lady ZEPHRIS. orLady ZELDA – this is my favorite group… one’s a Led Zeppelin cover band, one’s a creature from World of Warcraft, and one’s a charter yacht… I couldn’t have made any one of those up
BONUS MUSICAL MUSING: I’ve intended to gripe about this for a while now, but I kept forgetting to. It’s more shit that is plantains, and I didn’t hear any mention of it anywhere else. Why was Katy Perry’s I Kissed a Girl (I’m not linking the video for spite) such a huge deal when Jill Sobule sang about the same thing back in 1995, when it was still sort of taboo? Nowadays, it’s kind of slutty.
SIDENOTE: I’m not saying I want it to stop.
BONUS NON-MUSICAL MUSING: Cougars grow up to become cat women.
I don’t say this often – mostly because the majority of things are not – but here I go… BRILLIANT!
I’ve often thought when perusing my Twitter feeds, “Why did he or she say that?”
Usually the that pertains to a variety of other inappropriate TMI-type things. Sometimes though, people report where they are at, and by stating that, they are informing us Twitter users where they are not, and that long run-on sentence leads me to this:
monkeyBLOG monkeyDO 
