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Worth 1002 Words… Scared Mushrooms Edition

Posted on May 17, 2010 by sgottahurt

Trippin' Mushrooms

(via Bit and Run)

In My Brain While Sleeping… There’s An App For That?

Posted on May 16, 2010 by sgottahurt

I only give high-fives for Taco Bell...

This dream originally dealt with a weird cruise ship and a strange arcade, but it was odd in those ways you can’t explain.

What I can explain was one stand-up arcade game that projected images on the touch screen that were to be emulated by using your hands, palms, and fingers. Think Twister meets Flamin’ Finger.

Regardless, the game would be much better suited on something portable, à la iPhone:

("fingerpalm - what else were we going to call it" not available for Palm OS)

So for example, the above image would require the side of your right hand and one finger touch. Possible? No. Fun? Possibly.

But if I could have my druthers, I’d rather have an app that could locate the closest Taco Bell to me at any given point.

Taco Bell high-five!

If not that, then an app that played a pissing sound while I looked up answers to cheat at bar trivia… Don’t look at me like that! Gift certificates that can be redeemed at a later date are on the line!

Musical Musings… What’s The Deal With The Music Circa 93-95?

Posted on May 15, 2010 by sgottahurt

The other day, BoDeans’ Closer to Free sneaked its way back onto my radio from 1993, and it refueled my loathing of it. Why do I despise it? Although it was the theme to Party of Five (and apparently in Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron), that’s not why I can’t stand it. Just listen to it:

Ugh.

But then all of the sudden, a few other songs popped in my head that had long ago wore out their welcome (or never had a welcome in the first place), and that’s when I realized the title of this post (in the style of Seinfeld):

What’s the deal with some of the music that came out between 1993 and 1995?

Need examples? How about this 1993 song that’s actually from 1988. It’s probably what started this sound scene…

Although I can still enjoy The Proclaimers’ I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) from time to rare time, I can no longer even tolerate The Rembrandts’ I’ll Be There For You. Did you know it was written by the creators of Friends and shopped around? OMG! It was written by the creators of Friends and shopped around.

And then there was Blues Traveler’s Run-Around everywhere you turned (their Hook gets a pass – its video is quite the time capsule merely for containing the late host of Remote Control, Ken Ober):

Make it stop, you say. I say here’s Spin Doctor’s Two Princes:

And howzabout Deadeye Dick’s New Age Girl:

Okay, that song I still like, and it has nothing to do with the song being in Dumb and Dumber. (To be honest, I’m not a fan of The Farrelly Brothers.) But this song has to be considered the death knell of the movement. The nail in the coffin. The Roll to Me by Del Amitri. Seriously, this song sucks:

It’s all of this music’s fault that we still have to deal with these guys:

Hey, Dave Matthews Band! What Would You Say if I said jam bands suck?

Awful Battle… Awesome Idea, Awful Execution

Posted on May 14, 2010 by sgottahurt

Is this an ad for a high-powered compact blender, or for swinging? (It is called the Magic Bullet after all…)

Remember BluBlockers? The marketers behind the HD Vision Wrap Arounds hope you don’t.

This I really want to be true. I mean, if I did cook, I would cook with the NuWave Oven.

Does the Slim Clip really need an infomercial?

You probably have already witnessed this monstrosity of an ad for the Better Marriage Blanket, so here it is again!

InASense, Lost… Stuffed Animals Takes On A Whole Different Meaning

Posted on May 13, 2010 by sgottahurt

When does too much too much?

When does going too far become too far gone?

When does Mountain Dew become Mountain Done?

For uncensored, NSFW answers, click on this image.

(thanks to Urlesque and limited thanks to Etsy)

Happy Finds… Help! In Many Forms

Posted on May 12, 2010 by sgottahurt

This video has made it’s way around the ol’ TripleDoubleU a-plenty (why am I typing like that?), but that’s not gonna hinder me from a-placin’ it right ‘ere ag’in (it’s getting worse!)…

So wit’ that whole mess in mind, get yerself o’er ta this spiderweb sightin’ if’n ya might be fixin’ to help some kin:

(Click pic for link)

Kickstarter is a place one might find ’emselves at if yer lookin’ to be like tha ol’ kings and queens were wit’ dolin’ out fundin’ to projects like tha Moner Lisa or discoverin’ tha New World*.

If’n yer more inclined to offerin’ yer services at a whoppin’ five bones a crack, then look no further than Fiverr:

(Click pic for link)

Now if’n only someone could help me wit’ wha’ever ’tis I got goin’ on ‘ere, that’d be dandy.

(*not historically accurate)

JusWondering… Who Are The Hepburn And Tracy Of Today?

Posted on May 11, 2010 by sgottahurt

Nobody else is like Spencer and Tracy... or so I've been told.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I. Know. Films.

But only after the release of Die Hard in 1988. It was around then I started reading Entertainment Weekly (this was my first issue) and began my film studies at Wayne State University (go Tartars, I mean, Warriors!)…

So needless to say (yet I’ll say it anyway), I’ve never seen any of Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy’s films, but I do know that they are a beloved (or at least famous) Acting! pair, the likes of which no longer exist. Or do they?

I tried scouring the TripleDoubleU for Actors! that were in more than one movie together, and alas, I found nothing definitive. So I had to scour my own brain, and this compilation was the best I could do.

(NOTE: I didn’t count sequels or comedy duos, but all you’ll see… most were only in two films.)
(ANOTHER NOTE: I know there are more – please add the ones I’m missing in the comments.)
(A FINAL NOTE: I did not count John and Joan Cusack either, sickos.)

JULIA ROBERTS and RICHARD GERE

Pretty Woman
Runaway Bride

JULIA ROBERTS and CLIVE OWEN

Closer
Duplicity

KATE WINSLET and LEONARDO DICAPRIO

Titanic
Revolutionary Road

GEORGE CLOONEY and TILDA SWINTON

Michael Clayton
Burn After Reading

KEANU REEVES and CHARLIZE THERON

The Devil’s Advocate
Sweet November

ADAM SANDLER and DREW BARRYMORE

The Wedding Singer
50 First Dates

SIGOURNEY WEAVER and KEVIN KLINE

The Ice Storm
Dave

MICHAEL DOUGLAS and KATHLEEN TURNER (and DANNY DEVITO)

Romancing the Stone / Jewel of the Nile
War of the Roses

TOM CRUISE and NICOLE KIDMAN

Days of Thunder
Eyes Wide Shut

RALPH FIENNES and, um, LIAM NEESON

Schindler’s List
Clash of the Titans

KATE BOSWORTH and JAMES MARSDEN

Superman Returns
Straw Dogs (coming soon)

KEVIN SPACEY and KATE BOSWORTH

Beyond the Sea
21
Superman Returns

TOM HANKS and MEG RYAN

Joe Versus the Volcano
Sleepless in Seattle
You’ve Got Mail

JOHNNY DEPP and HELENA BONHAM CARTER

Corpse Bride
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Sweeney Todd
Alice in Wonderland

Drunken Recollection… Dream Cast Of X-Men: First Class

Posted on May 10, 2010 by sgottahurt

Sega had a different idea than me.

With the new (first?) (only?) A-Team movie coming out, we got to talking about the cast over some beers. We decided this dream cast (not the one above) would have been quite a coup:

The Dream Team

Bruce Willis as Hannibal, Brad Pitt as Face, Jim Carrey as Murdoch, and Michael Clarke Duncan as B.A. Baracus would have been expensive as hell, and I’m not calling the current cast the B-Team (ha!), but these guys would be totally worth it.

So then we started discussing that Matthew Vaughn (the guy that made Kick-Ass independent of any studio) will be helming X-Men: First Class. It should be noted that he was set to be the original director of X-Men 3 (which he hated). Since our train of thought was already on IRF (Ideal Role Fulfillment), this was the station our one track minds arrived at:

Yes, please.

Michael Rosenbaum could replace Patrick Stewart as a younger Professor X. Rosenbaum already carries comic credentials under his belt (he plays Lex Luthor on Smallville), so he already has the experience of playing the earlier version of an icon. Plus, DC owes Marvel someone since Green Lantern took Ryan Reynolds from Deadpool. Besides, audiences don’t care if Actors! double up on beloved characters (Captain Jean-Luc Picard held his ground as Professor X, Human Torch as Captain America, Han Solo as Indiana Jones, as so on).

It's the hair that won the job.

Replacing Magneto was tough. I started with Jude Law, another Brit, taking over for Sir Ian McKellen. But then we tried thinking about perhaps an Actor! of Jewish decent, since Erik Magnus Lehnsherr happened to be, and we could think of none. So they fought Law, and Law won.

And as for Cyclops / Scott Summers, this thought popped in our head…

Please no.

…and the game ended.

A Handful Of… Toys I Always Wanted To Exist

Posted on May 9, 2010 by sgottahurt

As a kid, was a skid, and no one knew me by name. Trashed my own house party ‘cuz nobody came.

Oops, I’m already off topic…

As a kid, there were a few toys that never existed that I always wish existed. Shall we reminisce together?

1) BOBA FETT (WITH FIRING MISSILE)

Everybody had a friend that had one.

Call it a choking hazard, call it natural selection, these toys never made it market. But I swear I knew a kid– ah, forget it.

2) GLORIA BAKER AND SHARK (FROM M.A.S.K.)

Thank T-Bob the fan-fic pic is clean.

I’m not sure why this toy was never made. It’s not like Kenner hadn’t made other water vehicles, or other female action figures (Vanessa Warfield).

3) HOVER BOARD