In my newly rediscovered appreciation for all things Kelly Preston, I was disappointed to realize what prudes we’ve become.
For the DVD cover of her classic (?) film, Mischief, there’s been some hanky-panky:
This image has been burned in my brain for so long.
There’s something missing. Something’s Photoshopped out of it, right? Let’s go to the poster:
I will never forget my first time... seeing this.
What?! Surely, this original poster hasn’t been Photoshopped… let’s check another:
How did people Photoshop (verb) before Photoshop (noun)?
Okay, I must be
perverted crazy. Because the way I remember this, his hand wasn’t pulling a Shooter McGavin… he was holding onto something…
God Bless the VHS
Tough and beautiful (always lead with tough) Zoe Saldana has a new movie coming out, in which she will neither be a blue cat person, nor Ashton Kutcher’s love interest, of which I see no difference.
They forgot to say "Vengeance is Tough." Always lead with "tough."
From the previews, it appears to be a high-octane, face-busting, car-blowing-up, Zoe-in-underwear-at-one-point good time. And I think it takes place in Ohio.
Columbiana, Ohio, as a matter of fact. Here’s their website. Here’s their Twitter account.
Here’s their antique store:
Come see new old things!
Here’s their movie theater:
Come here to see the movie if we get it!
Here’s (one of) their church(es):
Come and pray this film will play at our theater!
It seems like a nice quaint place… that looks nothing at all like it does on film:
But then again, George Clooney’s movie looked nothing like Rhode Island:
Syriana's in Rhode Island, right?
reason for leaving The Office latest hits theaters this week, and something about its title leaves a ringing in my ear.
This is kind of a weird poster.
Is it because of this recent celebrated film?
"I was on the way to Tron and stopped by to sing a bit."
Maybe it’s because of one of these turdfests from the past?
Drew used to be cuter when she was crazy - I mean, mad.
Same goes for Kristen.
Perhaps it’s one of these two flicks with almost the same name?
We're getting close...
We took a half step back...
It has nothing to do with this film, does it?
Yup. This happened.
I know what it is… Crazy Stupid Love very well could be the sequel to this:
Better tagline: "Heaven help her get laid and get food."
This was one of those dreams that occurred between snoozes, so adjustments developed that expanded on the concept that follows. I contemplated not posting this on the site because I like the idea quite a bit, but then I realized – I’m not a Hollywood insider, and I’d have no way to get this into the proper hands (if it was even in script form).
Anysphinctersayswhat, here’s the premise to what began as simply Austin Powers 4: Agent Origin, and evolved into… well, here’s the poster:
(Not So) Artistic Representation
Following the events of Goldmember, upon discovering that Austin Powers and Dr. Evil were brothers, the pair hop into the time machine to explore where everything went wrong between them. This leads them to the post-World Wars 40’s.
Of course, Justin Timberlake would play the younger version of Michael Caine’s Nigel Powers, and they’d uncover the origin of Austin’s “Mojo.”
They quickly learn that it was the freshly evil Scott Evil (Seth Green) that raised Dr. Evil to be evil. He left the present time as soon as they did to unleash his ultimate evil plan of pitting the brothers against each other.
So as they seek to change the past, they find themselves time travelling to the 50’s (where Scott picks up his new sidekick, the super dog and Russian ex-patriot, Laika), and eventually the 80’s to when Scott was born.
Of course everything works well, but the specifics… well, I didn’t dream those, and until Hollywood comes calling, I ain’t saying. Maybe.