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Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Pop Culture Jumbalaya

Posted on March 28, 2011 by sgottahurt

Remember your ABC's... sitcoms...

There have been a few things that I’ve remembered or discovered or wondered that didn’t warrant their own posts. So here they all are in one place!

What do Growing Pains, Hangin’ with Mr. Cooper, and Full House all have in common?

Well, they were all on ABC. That’s easy. But did you ~~know~~ remember ~~care~~ that Alan Thicke appeared at the beginning of Mark Curry’s new show to welcome him to the network as well as the old Growing Pains‘ set? Hangin’ with Mr. Cooper’s first show took place in the Seaver home – as is/was. That’s weird. But even weirder still was that the second episode featured Michelle Tanner (Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen) and Uncle Jesse (John Stamos) from Full House. Weirdest of all – the show lasted five seasons.

EMF and Andrew Dice Clay’s worlds collided.

I had no idea that the opening “Oh!” and titular line “That’s unbelievable!” in EMF’s Unbelievable were sampled from raunchy “comedian” Andrew Dice Clay. And that’s unbelievable.

Things that still make me go hmmm…

I haven’t been able to find anything one way or another about these possible Coinkydinks or Coinkydonks, but it doesn’t mean that they’re true (or not):

Did Huey Lewis and the News name themselves such as an homage to 60’s rock group Gary Lewis and the Playboys?

Did 90’s Britpop group Elastica take that name as a spoof and celebration of hard rock band Metallica?

Does anyone else besides me care? You’re unbelievable.

The Sh– To Even More The Sh–… The Schnitzelbank Song

Posted on March 27, 2011 by sgottahurt

I am in utter absolute glory. I recently visited this German bar in Detroit:

Pictured: Dakota Inn of Detroit (Not Pictured: Surrounding Urban Blight)

It was in this very place that I thought I discovered the magnificent Schnitzelbank Song. Here is the accompanying chart (because how awesome can a drinking song be without an accompanying chart):

Yes, that Haufen Mist is a pile of cow dung...

In public, it sort of went something like this (I swear the Dakota’s Inn version was 100x better):

But in all my research, I came to realize why this song has endeared itself so strongly to me. And that reason why is this:

(SIDENOTE: It also explains why the name Otto von Schnitzelpusskrankengescheitmeyer has long been stuck in my subconscious…)

Hibbidy-Wah?! The Difference Has Never Been Made So Clear (And Catchy)

Posted on March 26, 2011 by sgottahurt

Thank you, thank you, thank you Parry Gripp! Now I know what makes a turtle a turtle and a tortoise a tortoise!

This is a real Blastoise.

(More real Pokemón here.)

Drunken Recollection… Strange Animal Sports

Posted on March 23, 2011 by sgottahurt

Apparently, this happens:

At the bar, someone brought up the fact they used to play this in high school. (I still doubt they played it. Seems kind of potentially dangerous.) But nonetheless, I didn’t believe, and in not believing, I made an ass of myself.

The last time I didn’t believe, it was about this being possible:

I had to eat crow after that.

Thanks, I’m here all night!

Happy Find… The Truth About Facebook

Posted on March 22, 2011 by sgottahurt

I recently got rooked into Facebook by way of a Gmail link-up, and I have to be honest… it’s kind of dumb. As I look at everybody making statements and people commenting on them and liking them… it’s kind of dumb. I might be biting the hand that feeds, though, especially now since I’m on the CIA’s grid.

Via the awesome and layered Onion News Network:

So, Duh! Pop Quiz… Song Sequels Edition

Posted on March 21, 2011 by sgottahurt

If movies can have sequels, why can’t songs? After all, the film industry stole the idea of remakes from the music world (this is pure speculation). And Aerosmith did create a song trilogy (Amazin’, Cryin’, and Crazy).

I don’t know who’s to blame for the concept of reboots…

Anywhoistoblameforsampling, here are a few songs that are follow-ups – see if you can guess the originals:

1) The Limousines’ Internet Killed the Video Star

2) Veruca Salt’s Volcano Girls

3) Rihanna and Eminem’s Love the Way You Lie (Part II)

4) Third Eye Blind’s Semi-Charmed Life

5) Peter Schilling’s Major Tom (Coming Home)

(As usual, answers – and some explaining – after the jump.) Read More

Musical Musings… Red Hot Chilly Michigan

Posted on March 20, 2011 by sgottahurt

I’m ashamed to admit that I have a copy of Red Hot Chili Pepper’s Stadium Arcadium and… I’ve never listened to it. So imagine my surprise when I discovered that they had a song called Especially in Michigan:

Apparently, lead singer Anthony Kiedis is from Grand Rapids, hence the tune’s existence. Albeit the ditty could have existed without him coming from here. (Filmmaker Paul Schrader is also from Grand Rapids, and he set half of Hardcore there. But that’s neither here nor there. Well, I guess it is here… moving on…)

What I’m equally surprised by is that nothing locally ever uses it for promotion. I suppose it doesn’t contain the most uplifting lyrics in the world, with gems like this:

Lions and Tigers come running just to steal your luck…

I guess the moral of the story is I’d rather listen to anything other than more Rebecca Black…

Awful Battle… Bad Puppet Double Whammy!

Posted on March 18, 2011 by sgottahurt

I love having Netflix. You set into place a stream of consciousness, and you await your next surprise. Sometimes the arrivals are pleasant; sometimes they’re downright awful. Hence today’s Awful Battle.

If I didn’t (or at least attempt to) watch these back-to-back, I wouldn’t have let you know that I had Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend in my queue. Here’s the breakdown of the plot (via Netflix):

While on a safari in Africa, a zoologist and her husband (Sean Young and William Katt) stumble on a family of dinosaurs. They want to share their remarkable discovery with the world but their attempt to bring back evidence is thwarted by a rival scientist (Patrick McGoohan). Danger and adventure await the couple, who only want to help these long-lost animals survive even longer and prevent their exploitation.

It’s a kid-movie I saw once as a kid and now as an adult. Here’s a taste:

Again, I wouldn’t have much to say if I didn’t try to watch Exterminator City after it. Here’s Netflix’s breakdown:

A robot detective tracks an inhuman killing machine in this action-packed story set in the near future. It’s the year 2027, and Astro City is being terrorized by a robot pest-controller moonlighting as a serial killer. With the list of victims growing longer each day, a steely robot homicide detective and an evil robot psychiatrist track the heartless killer on a path that leads them into a sinister world of technological horrors.

Sounds like it could be good-bad, right? I initially entered it into my queue after seeing this video a long ways back:

Looks like it could be good-bad, right?

Wrong. Exterminator City is quite possibly the most unwatchable thing I’ve ever – EVER! (the caps mean I’m serious, not yelling) – witnessed.

It’s essentially a booby flick. Not a soft-core sci-fi film, mind you. A booby flick. All I saw ~~as I fast-forwarded through~~ was topless woman after topless woman, with robot shit like the above sword fight in between, and squished bugs. I didn’t even make it to that sword fight, fast-forward or otherwise. The DVD stayed in my player 15 minutes, tops.

But after witnessing that horror, it made me take note of three similarities between Baby and Exterminator City.

The puppets look horrible. I do lament the days before CGI, but the T-rex and raptors in Jurassic Park were animatronics most times, and they looked great… only 8 years after Baby.
The plots are nonsense. Exterminator City doesn’t even stand a chance here. But in Baby, as the married heroes are trying to keep their hatchling safe, what do they do? Basically, they fuck in the middle of the jungle and lose track of Baby! This is what gives the movie its “story”! A kid’s movie!
There are naked boobies and a murder in the first five minutes. Again, no-brainer for one. Very strange for a kid’s film! (The boobies belong to African dancers, but still…)

A Handful Of… Songs About Days Other Than “Friday”

Posted on March 15, 2011 by sgottahurt

By now, everyone (or at least 21 million people at the time of this posting) have seen Rebecca Black’s Friday. If not, it’s after the jump below.

It’s inane, mundane, insane lyrics and musical progression made me think of every other song about days of the week. Here are those that came to mind:

Saturday Night’s Alright (For Fighting) – Sir Elton John

Sunday Bloody Sunday – U2

Manic Monday – The Bangles

(SIDENOTE: In retrospect, this is barely better than Ms. Black’s song.)

Ruby Tuesday – The Rolling Stones

(SIDENOTE: Yes, I am aware that it’s not about the day itself. Or is it?)

Waiting for Wednesday – Lisa Loeb & Nine Stories

(SIDENOTE: The alternate for this one was Digital Underground’s Humpty Dance. Because it’s hump day, you see.)

Understanding in a Car Crash – Thursday

(SIDENOTE: There are no songs about Thursday, so I had to go with the band. I think Ms. Black really missed an opportunity here. She could have had the only song about Thursday – even though Thursday’s aren’t as fun-fun-fun – and then the last day of the week could have been left to The Cure’s Friday I’m in Love.)