I just love this British bird:
The One and Only Rosie Jones (not counting the golfer, Rosie Jones)
Unbeknownst to her, Rosie Jones has been in a long-standing heated battle with Alison Brie to be my number one crush, but every once in a while, she pulls ahead (as when I suggested her for a role in the inevitable Home Improvement movie.)
Hearing her lovely lilting accent puts her on top once again (as opposed to her usual nude Page Three photo shoots):
I sure loves me some chocolate milk. It is pure delight, especially with Oreos and Chips Ahoy!
I also sure loves me some booze. It is pure delight with Taco Bell and pizza!
But can the two work together? This company sure thinks so…
Introducing Adult Chocolate Milk!
What do they mean re-taste?! I still drink chocolate milk!
With a 20% alcohol content, it better leave you feeling dairy effed up. Too bad it’s only available in Arizona, California, and Minnesota currently, and it’s super expensive to ship. Because I could really go for some booze and cookies…
I’m a man that prefers simple. Cut to the chase. No silly games. WYSIWYG.
But I’m also the kind of guy that enjoys the bizarre. Against the grain. Conspiracies. WTF.
This Drunken Recollection involves the latter. One night after soccer, my friend Chris mentioned that my brother had a flight layover at the Denver International Airport, and that he had asked him if he’d witnessed anything strange.
I didn’t know what he was referring to, so he pointed out the likes of this:
Okay, well, that borders on the irrational and fantastical (and kind of insane), but the main thing was that these types of conspiracies existed.
About an airport.
And none of it dealt with the fact it was a international airport nowhere near any other nations.
The DIA Conspiracy Files blog delves further into other aspects, but as a (rational) counterpoint, here ya go:
I still don’t understand why a city in just about the middle of the state would be international:
It's the cream-filling between Mexico and Canada.
Call it the Netflix of the art world! (Or more appropriately, the Blockbuster of the art world, since I can’t see either lasting that long…)
Introducing, Turning Art!
From my limited understanding (of not only the above site but the world), apparently you pick out artwork you want to hang up, and when you get sick of it, you send it back for another picture, à la Netflix.
Oh! As it turns out, I’m exactly right:
It’s kind of sad that the video only has about 250 or so hits. I wonder how many visits the actual site gets.
Unfortunately, the more I think about how I wanted to tease this site, the more I feel compelled to herald it. I don’t know if there’s an actual market for cycling wall art, but it’s great there’s an outlet for raw talent.
I guess my ironic Happy Find changed into a legitimate one, just like you can with duplicated prints!
Nope, I’m back to ironic.
One of the benefits of having my house broken into for the second time in two months (yes – this happened, and yes – there is a benefit) is cleaning up old shit. In this case, it’s food that I should have gotten around to throwing out a while ago.
Sorry that the pictures below are not that clear. This is because my phone is two years old, and in the world of technology, it’s out-dated… just like this food.
It’s a shame about the Sean’s Irish Cream Liqueur… I’ll never know how tasty the 17% alcohol concoction could have been. That is, unless my sibs buy it as a Christmas present for me again. (Me and the booze have the same name!)
The Rice Krispies box made me laugh because of its screaming promotion for Monster’s, Inc. Jigglypuff elicited the same response (that’s the Pokémon on the Kraft’s Mac & Cheese).
And I have to be honest about one thing… provided I have a weekend with no plans, I will probably still try to eat the Campbell’s Soup and the Laffy Taffy.
Maybe I can sell The Simpsons can on eBay…
There have been a lot of these made over the [choose your own increment of time passed]*, and I only present this one to you because of the awesome [choose your own segment of the following video]**.
(via Screen Junkies)
*I chose “months.”
**I chose “ending.” I mean, c’mon… Troll 2 and The Room?! It gives me a [choose your own physical reaction].
Yeah. I don’t know how I feel about this.
So it turns that Google has been developing cars that drive themselves. This comes out less than two years since one of their mapping vans hit a baby deer (and documented it).
All this when we haven’t even perfected teledildonics yet.
For those that don’t know what teledildonics is (I just found out myself), allow me to present you with a sample:
Coming soon to the Wii. Heh.
If you haven’t put two and two twogether yet, I’ll let Wikipedia spell it out for you:
Teledildonics (also known as “cyberdildonics”) are electronic sex toys that can be controlled by a computer.
Even the above Wiimotes can be accessed and used by a computer.
If you don’t think that’s Hibbidy-Wah?! enough for you, then there’s always this:
Don’t get me wrong… I love my iPhone, but sometimes things come up that make me wish I had an Android phone.
Case in point – without jailbreaking my cell, Apple will not allow me to download and use the incredibly evil app called:
Bluff My Phone (available here) is a handy little tool in creating havoc, and it works like this:
We didn’t try anything at the bar, but the next day at work, we had a good time pranking a few co-workers, acting as clients. Alas, we did not record them (we forgot in the excitement). But my boss/friend Paul devised the darkest prank of all (I helped).
While his wife was at home sleeping after working the night shift at the hospital, he called her mother (his mother-in-law) from his wife’s cellphone as she watched their kids downstairs. I suggested this phrasing:
Is this “Mom”? I wouldn’t suggest coming upstairs. I’m standing over your daughter!
Or something like that.
We laughed.
He tried it.
He was sent to his mother-in-law’s voicemail.
So he tried directly spooking his wife.
Still half-asleep, she recognized his voice immediately.
Prank over.
Maybe next time.
(SIDENOTE: I’ve come a long way since this.)
Would you raise $10,000,000 to make this go away?
"Hurley"
Well, not the actor Jorge Garcia, per sé, but the band that produced the above CD, Weezer.
Now before I go on and on about how this guy James Burns is trying to do just that, raise ten million bucks to force Rivers Cuomo and crew to disband their band, I should let it be known that I was going to list plenty of other performers I would pay to stop:
I was going to go as far as listing artists like Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber, but other sites have done this.
So now inspired by James Burns movement, and Weezer’s latest album cover, I propose this:
How about we raise $10,000,000 to film a different finale for LOST?
Who’s with me? That show unraveled faster than a sweater and had me screaming, “Say it ain’t so!”
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