vcr

JusWondering… What Else Should They Bring Back?

Posted on by sgottahurt

This just screams porno stash.

Often owned by strangers with candy.

Well whadayanknow?

Last year, Polaroid got rid of their Instant Cameras.  I wrote about it here when this blog was still a fledgling.

But courtesy of The Impossible Project (or of a PR stunt the likes of the Heene family – the last batches of film sold recently expired), Polaroid is bringing sexy Instant Cameras back.

This got me thinking… what other foregone technologies would I like to see return?

1) Spindle

threadingspindle

In fairy tales, they were able to spin straw into gold.  They also acted as GHB when it came to princesses.  So maybe they shouldn’t come back.

2) Dick Tracy Copmobile

With technology like that, kids’ imaginations had to flourish.  (See the original toy commercial down below.)*

3) Top Loading VCR’s

"What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" "The VCR heads!"

“What’s Eating Gilbert Grape?” “The VCR heads!”

Nostalgia and functionality and purpose aside… look at how easy it was to use?  With all those dials and switches and buttons, you could set the clock!  (Ra-tat-tat-CRASH!)  Of course I want it back for nostalgic reasons (but still not functionality and purpose).

4) Libraries

The Dewey Decimal System was "thisclose" to being the Huey Whole Number System. The Louie Lottery System wasn't even close.

The Dewey Decimal System was "thisclose" to being the Huey Whole Number System. The Louie Lottery System wasn't even close.

There’s something terribly wrong with kids today, and I stand by two reasons why:

  1. Siblings each having their own bathroom growing up, instead of fighting to share one.
  2. Libraries aren’t used as social gathering places anymore.

Wait, what?  Libraries still exist?  I thought the Internet would have surely killed them.  My bad.

SIDENOTE: While we await the Instant Cameras’ re-release, why not pick up this camera that logs every moment of your life?  It’s like YouTube meets Twitter!

You know you want it

You know you want it

*Original Dick Tracy Copmobile commercial after the jump Read More

InASense, Lost… Commercials For Quote-Unquote Religions

Posted on by sgottahurt

I remember being a lad of about 29 years old, and I finally gathered the nerve to ask my mom, “Where do babies come from?”

I often think back to my childhood, and remember Saturday mornings as a kid.  Rolling out of bed from underneath my taped together Garbage Pail Kid posters.  Grabbing a box of Cocoa Krispies and the biggest bowl I could handle.  Turning on the TV without a remote control because we had none.  Zoning out to crappy yet awesome cartoons and the commercials that sold me on Transformers and Star Wars and Centurions and M.A.S.K. with little to no effort.  Then there would come along one of these ads:

Granted, it’s not one of the most heartwarming, but very often, they’d catch me by surprise and effect me on a personal level.  Gee, maybe I should help my neighbor shovel the snow instead of throwing snowballs at them from my fort, I might consider.  What I didn’t realize at the time was that it was a COMMERCIAL FOR A RELIGION!  If I wasn’t born and raised Roaming Recovering Roman Catholic, seeing Jesus H. Christ’s name up there might have been a red alert, but I was, so it didn’t.  (Also, I wasn’t raised in a way that told me we were the only ones that were right, so at least I had that going for me.)

So now this little vid is making it’s way around the web.  I recieved it via a link in an email from frequent idea spurner Dave, and I watched it in similar wonder to the old LSD, er, I mean LDS commercials.  It was beautiful, and in fact made me happy to be alive.  Damn YouTube and their header captions:

I guess what I’m saying is it’s much more effective than this old thang:

In other words, how can so many inches of Tom Cruise can be wrong?  (My guess: 60 of his 67…)