Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk?

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Am I A Trendsetter?

Posted on by sgottahurt

As I (unabashedly) brought to your attention in my last Happy Find, I started another blog called Micro Mike Rowe.  I began that punny wonder on April 20th.

Then on April 26th, this bit appeared on Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! Enjoy Little Danson Man:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

more about “Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk?“, posted with vodpod

Hmm… my cut-and-paste craze is barely off the ground, and one screwball skit makes a trend not.

But then yesterday, on May 3rd’s Attack of the Show, apropos of nothing, co-host Morgan Webb appeared between segments as Tiny Morgan.  Alas there is no available clip of that, but this bit immediately followed it.  As (barely) proof, check out Kristin Adams opening for The Feed (or check this vid at the 2:54 mark):

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Morgan Webb is much more fun to edit than Mike Rowe... Sorry, buddy...

Coinkydink?  Or Coinkydonk?  You decide…

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? This Is No Longer A Coinkydink, Right?

Posted on by sgottahurt

I once drunkenly questioned the intentions of a skit on Saturday Night Live, and wondered whether the bit was spoofing the Insane Clown Posse or not.

This occurred on the last episode hosted by Ryan Phillippe, and I can’t stop laughing about it:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Then I found out about this, and I can’t stop laughing about it more:

My Drunken Recollection has been proven, right?  I wish I had seen these videos in the opposite order, but oh well.  Just add it to the list of magical mysteries, under blankets and magnets…

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Bigger… And… Faster… Ah, Forget It

Posted on by sgottahurt

"Draw Your Own Conclusions" Edition

Jimmy Johnson is an NFL coach that demands hard work and speed on the field.  When off the field, he promotes Extenze (I refuse to make the Z a capital letter).

Jimmy John’s is a sandwich shop that demands hard work and speed in the field.  When in the stores, they promote hard work and speed in creating tasty sandwiches.

Here are the Urban Dictionary definitions of jimmy and johnson.

I believe there is a comedy bit in here somewhere, but I don’t feel like shuffling through the gutters of my twelve-year-old mind.

So here’s an excellent bit from the Onion.  It will be doing the heavy lifting.

Oh wait – I’ve got it!

Top Ten Things Overheard By Jimmy Johnson At A Jimmy John’s After Taking ExtenZe (Dammit Z, You Got Me!)

10) Go long!  Old habit…

9) So you’re fast?

8) Extra meat please!

7) No Slim for me!

6) I just took an ExtenZe pill!

5) No, I don’t own this place!

4) That was quick!

3) How much?

2) That much!?

1) This pill ain’t doing dick for me!

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Sandra Bullock’s Pickle

Posted on by sgottahurt

Definition: pick•le (v)

fix; informal term for a difficult situation; “he got into a terrible fix”; “he made a muddle of his marriage”; “Sandra Bullock’s in quite a pickle”

Hot off of an Oscar (and Razzie) win, Sandra Bullock has found herself on the butt-end of a debacle involving her husband, Jesse James, possibly having an affair with tattoo canvas, Michelle “Bombshell” McGee.

James’ former paramour and mother of his daughter, Janine Lindemulder, was also a fan of porn, well, watch this video and see…

BONUS: Is the Oscar curse in full effect?

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? “The Weaver” In Action

Posted on by sgottahurt

When I used to work at the video store, one of my friends there introduced me to the idea of “The Weaver.”  His definition:

Some actresses look really hot in some movies, and not so much in others… just like Sigourney Weaver.  Hence, ‘The Weaver.’

She hasn’t been around for a while (aside from doing voices in animated films).  Scratch that.  She did three movies in 2008 (Baby Mama, Vantage Point, Be Kind Rewind), but I barely remembered her being in them.

But my point is this – throughout her history in film, sometimes she looked better than others.  To begin, I reference her duality in Avatar:

Why so blue?

In the film, her character even made a reference to her cartoon self looking “hotter” than her actual self.  Rather than me inputting my opinions (not like I ever do this), here are images of some of her major roles.  You can decide which side of The Weaver scale she falls.  (Not included below: Half Moon Junction, because of these NSFW results.)

Alien - Aliens - Alien 3 - Alien Resurrection

The Year of Living Dangerously

Ghostbusters 1 and 2

Gorillas in the Mist: The Story of Dian Fossey

Working Girl

Dave

Galaxy Quest

Heartbreakers

Holes

The Village

Others that fall victim to The Weaver:

Cameron Diaz - Renee Zellweger - Reese Witherspoon

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Tim And Eric Are LOST?

Posted on by sgottahurt

I apologize for the lack of timeliness of this post, and the lack of evidence to back it up, but it’s something weird I noticed that reaches a level of Coinkydink or Coinkydonk.  As a refresher, a Coinkydink is a coincidence, while a Coinkydonk is on purpose.

Anyadultswim, I am a huge fan of the phrase, “Fair enough.”  I first picked it up from Tim and Eric’s cartoon (?) Tom Goes to the Mayor.  The titular Tom Peters was equally fond of the saying:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Another thing picked up from both of those shows happened to come from their credits:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Now I may not regularly say either “fair enough” or “absolutely,” but whenever I hear them uttered, BOOM!  I think of Tim and Eric.

While watching Season 5 of LOST in preparation for Season 6, I realized both phrases were said a lot.  “Fair enough” was said so much that a forum practically devoted an entire thread to it.

As for “absolutely,” here are a couple quotes from Season 5:

John Locke: Absolutely. Richard has agreed to show us where we need to go. So I’m gonna go and see Jacob right now. And I’d like all of you to come with me

James ‘Sawyer’ Ford: You still got my back?
Juliet Burke: Absolutely.

Were I so inclined to (or provided I had the time and technology), I would have put together a YouTube video as proof.  Maybe one day I will, but for now, you’ll have to take my word for it.

So what does this all mean, you wonder?  I think the answer is simple:

Are you LOST? Because so am I...

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Do Disney Heroines Have A Dress Code?

Posted on by sgottahurt

Beginning in 1937, Walt Disney set a precedent with Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Was it in animation? I guess possibly.

Was it in film history? Maybe.  I think so.

Was it in– Listen man, do I look like a film major or something?  (For the record – I am.)

The precedent I speak of is a simple one: almost all Disney heroines wear blue.

EXAMPLE 1: THE DISNEY PRINCESSES

Snow White - Cinderella - Aurora (Briar-Rose) - Eilonwy - Ariel - Jasmine - Pocahontas - Mulan - Kira - Tiana

Okay, so Snow White is wearing all the primary colors, Sleeping Beauty’s dress changes back and forth between pink and blue, Eilonwy’s eyes are the bluest thing on her, and only pieces of Pocahontas and Mulan’s outfits are blue, but there’s still further proof in the pudding.

EXAMPLE 2: THE DISNEY NON-PRINCESSES

Blue Fairy - Alice - Wendy - Jenny - Belle - Esmerelda - Jane

This one’s easy. The Blue Fairy has the color in her name; Alice & Belle and Wendy & Jenny are practically twins; Esmerelda’s corset is blue and for Jane it’s her kerchief.  Blue eyes are shared by almost all of these ladies as well.  Sorry Belle (brown) and Esmerelda (green).

EXAMPLE 3: THE DISNEY ANIMALS

Jumbo - Lady - Purdy - Duchess

Lady and Purdy might only have blue collars, and Duchess only blue eyes, but Jumbo sure has one big blue blanket.  As far as the animals go, these few are lucky.  The others…

EXAMPLE 4: WILD ANIMALS AND WILD, UM, CHILDS

Bambi's Mother - Maid Marian - Bianca - Nala - Megara - Lilo

These are the unlucky ones that break the blue streak.  It makes sense that Bambi’s Mother and Nala don’t represent the traditional hue, seeing as how their stories take place in the wild, but it’s also interesting that the anthropomorphized animals (Maid Marian and Bianca) wear purple alongside the temptress-turned-heroine Megara.  I figure Lilo never wears blue since her pet “puppy” Stitch is nothing but.

So what does all this blue business mean?

Blue is the color of the sky and sea. It is often associated with depth and stability. It symbolizes trust, loyalty, wisdom, confidence, intelligence, faith, truth, and heaven. (via Color Wheel Pro)

Hmm… those are pretty decent traits for all these characters to be associated with.  What I don’t understand is whay there has to be an emphasis on pretty…

Wait.  The emphasis was mine.  Never mind.

(Thanks to David for the tip)

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Cash-Ins, Tie-Ins, Sell Outs, And Bailouts

Posted on by sgottahurt

Let’s examine for one second which car companies sponsored which, um, sponsorees…

Frothy the Snow Cowell

Eight years ago, Ford Motor Company decided to back a show that was not much more than a flashier Star Search. 

  • Was it Coca Cola’s shared involvement? 
  • Was it a long standing crush on Paula Adbul?
  • Or was it amazing foresight from a company that renamed the Taurus the Five Hundred, and then redubbed it the Taurus again?

Turns out it doesn’t matter.  Once Kelly Clarkson happened, American Idol legitimized and therefore blew up.

Speaking of blowing up, let’s remind ourselves which guys GM got behind (or as in the case of this image – between):

"Stuck between two loose screws" - GM's new slogan

  • GM decided to back Tiger Woods through its Cadillac brand, and that was a good investment for a long time. 
  • They also paid a fair amount of cash to have their fleet of cars featured in both horrible Transformers movies, and those flicks made My Little Ponies pretty pennies.

And in the end, which car company required money from the government bailout?

"Um, Toyota?"

Nope.

"Oh hi... I didn't see you back there."

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? The Sean Bean Effect

Posted on by sgottahurt

Should it be pronounced Shawn Bawn?

There’s a common misconception on the TripleDoubleU about Actor! Sean Bean:

He dies in like 85% of his movies!

Another misconception - this is his brother.

The fact of the matter (according to my limited research) is that he’s died in hardly any of his films:

  • Patriot Games
  • GoldenEye
  • Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring
  • Equilibrium
  • The Hitcher

I believe it’s the 1-2-3 punch of his higher profile roles leading up to LOTR.  Not many knew who he was when he played the bad guy in the second Jack Ryan film, but that lead to him getting recognized as Agent 006 in the successful James Bond reboot, and then of course, Boromir – the most noble of his deaths.  And the seed was officially planted.

There are plenty of Actors! that have died more in the movies (Robert DeNiro has 14 times, Bruce Willis has 11, Johnny Depp has 9 1/2… the article that explains the 1/2, and lists more can be found here).

The Sean Bean Effect is alive and well for those guys, and he may one day catch up and surpass them, but what about Actors! that die in television shows?

I’m going to name that effect after this guy:

Jeffrey Dean Morgan, of the Jeffrey Dean Morgan Effect

Not only did Jeffery Dean Morgan have high-profile deaths in Watchmen and P.S. I Love You, he died or was dead or was a ghost in these shows:

  • Weeds
  • Supernatural
  • Grey’s Anatomy

(BONUS: A victim of both The SB and JDM Effects – Alan Tudyk.  He played Wash in the awesome show Firefly, and died in the theatrically released Serenity.  He also died in the reboot of V.)

He did not die in Dodgeball.

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? The Best Name To Survive With

Posted on by sgottahurt

(SIDENOTE: This is one whopper of a CoC, and I fear it is my greatest discovery.)

I love you, television.

There, I said it.  Are you happy now?  Be it that I’m an idiot for staring into your warming glow (if that’s how you want to take the term “boob tube”) or because I suckle your glass nipple (if that’s how you want to take the term “boob tube”), please know this – you complete me.

Now that that’s out of my system, onto business!  I’m sorry baby, but I’ve got work to do.

Two of my favorites shows on television had “mergers” a couple of seasons ago: Lost and The Office.

Lost had this happen in their second season, and the reason why, as producers explained, was to extend the show’s storyline if needed by adding more characters with new flashbacks (I know this from memory, and I’m paraphrasing because I’m too lazy to look it up).  The “merger” involved having the survivors in the tail section of the crashed airplane join the remaining survivors.  At the start of the third season, the season commitment contract was locked up, and almost all of the new cast members introduced the year prior were eliminated.  Almost.

As for The Office, the third season had two branches “merging,” à la the UK (original) version’s second series (that’s what they call “seasons” across the pond).  Unlike the British version, almost every new character quit out frustration with their new boss.  Almost.

So by now, several seasons later, only two cheeses stood, um, alone.

  • On Lost, it was Bernard Nadler, “tailie” and husband to Rose Henderson:

Actor! Sam Anderson as Bernard Nadler

  • On The Office, it was anger-prone Andy Bernard, a.k.a. The Nard-Dog, alumnus of Cornell University:

Actor! Ed Helms as Andy Bernard

So to recap… the two characters that survived massive cast “mergers” were both named Bernard.  Do I smell a Coinkydink or is that a tinge of Coinkydonk?

BONUS COINKYDINK OR COINKYDONK: An Actor! by the combined name of Andy Nadler played a character named Barnard (sp?) in the independent film, The Guatemalan Handshake.  Consider your mind blown.