InASense, Lost… Macrophilia (Yep, It’s Sexual)

Will wonders never cease?  As in, “I wonder how this fetish developed?”

Allow me to introduce MACROPHILIA to your lexicon.  It’s not what you think.  Or it’s exactly what you think.  Anything philia usually has to deal with makin’ whoopie (sorry, now that I have cable, I’ve skimmed past an episode of the Newlywed Game, hosted by Carnie Wilson for some reason).  And macro means big, so volia!

Weird, right?

Weird, right?

Apparently, there’s a portion of men that get excited at the prospect of being stepped on by a giant woman.  Want more proof, check out this kind of NSFW site.  It’s partially about dominance, partially about foot fetishism, and partially about voreaphilia (geez!), but it’s totally… odd.

As for where the fetish originated in older gents?

Oooweee! I wish she'd step on me!

Oooweee! I wish she'd step on me!

And for future generations?

Oooweee! I hope only 'she' steps on me!

Oooweee! I hope only 'she' steps on me!

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In My Brain While Sleeping… Lily Allen, Free Tickets, And The Chinese Restaurant

Vodpod videos no longer available.

 

 

 

So long as I’ve been following her on Twitter (I made it at least a few posts without bringing the micro-blogger up), Lily Allen has been playing a little game with her fans.  Every town she visits, she hides tickets and Tweets cryptic clues to their locations.

I’ve already dreamed in Twitter.  The next step was this:

When the British songstress visited Detroit, I tried figuring out the hints, but I didn’t bother searching.  My dream changed all that.

I was in a Chinese restaurant downtown near the casinos.  What’s funny is I don’t know if there are any Chinese restaurants there, and I certainly don’t eat Chinese (I stick to the basics of pizza and Pop Tarts, thanks).

Anywok, for some reason I was the host of said establishment, and there was a short girl with long black hair blocking her face.  She was hanging out in the waiting area, and she kept looking in at me, even though she didn’t have a reservation. 

Eventually, I realized that she was looking at my podium, and I headed to the front to see what all the fuss was about.  There were two blue tickets taped to the wood grain.  They weren’t official looking or anything.  It was as if they were made in Print Shop or something.

(Not So) Artistic Representation

(Not So) Artistic Representation

I peeled them off and Lily Allen rushed toward me, moving the hair from her face.  “Congratulations!” she said with her cute accent.  And no one in the place budged.

Disappointed with the dining crowd’s reaction, I shouted, “Free computers are hidden all over Greektown!”  Everyone leaped to their feet and dispersed, ditching their bills to do so.  I was fired on the spot, but it didn’t matter… not the way Lily was looking at me.

“Howzabout we skip me concert and go for a stroll,” she said.  And we did.

INGREDIENTS: Too much Twitter… and Jellybean Nerds.

Happy Find… How To Dance: The Final Chapter

I think my brain melted over the weekend. 

During my marathon of a certain horror film series that gets its reboot this Valentine’s Day weekend, I stumbled across a particular scene in The Final Chapter (not really) of Friday the 13th that I had seen once before.  While working on an older post about Back to the Future’s Crispin Glover, I had played through some videos of his career and life missteps.  This is one glaring example of a misstep if I ever saw one: