Video games and hula hoops might be considered childish things.
But what about a fake movie trailer based on a video game and a mesmerizing mellow dance routine using a hula hoop?
You’re not reading this anyway. You’re looking at the videos, right? I can say anything I want here, and I’m going to take full advantage of that. I sometimes daydream about getting lick-attacked by, like, a dozen puppies.
The other day, I was a little lax on my DVR commercial skipping, and this commercial came on:
What the fuck is this movie?! Branded! It’s not even on Wikipedia (all hail Wikipedia). It’s barely on IMDb…
It looks like it could be a kick-ass movie; it also looks like it could dumb as hell.
But either way, I’d know nothing about it if – *gulp* – I didn’t watch the commercials.
(P.S. I guess it’s a Russian film. Could be Night Watch; could be The Darkest Hour.)
The Avengers aren’t hitting the big screen until next summer, so here’s the trailer for the small screen version now:
Aside from that, there’s a newer online dating site called HowAboutWe that could be interesting… if I online dated.
But my other big to-do is about the Lytro, a functional light field camera, which means you can take a picture without worrying about focusing – you can change the focus later:
Of course I know in reality, this is neither a Coinkydink or a Coinkydonk, but it’s fun nonetheless.
The first time I saw this preview, I thought it was brilliant… a throwback to previews of films from the 70’s edited in the style of Generation YouTube. Here is the trailer for David Fincher’s upcoming The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo:
The first time I saw this preview moments ago, I thought it also was brilliant. And green. Definitely green…
Once upon a time, I really thought Jim Carrey was funny.
He had a spectrum of characters on In Living Color, and both Ace Ventura films were a hoot (see what I did there). The Mask and Dumb and Dumber were practically (or actually) tailor-made for him, and Liar Liar was the pièce de résistence for that phase of his career.
But then came The Truman Show and Man on the Moon, and things started to get tricky. He couldn’t quite go back to wacky. I wasn’t too big a fan of Me, Myself & Irene (although I blame that more on my waning Farrelly Brothers sensibilities). Bruce Almighty was all-righty then, and at that point, boom goes the dynamite. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind erases every Grinch, every Majestic, every Cable Guy, and every Riddler, Batman forever.
So what’s he to do? His adult fare no longer fared well (Fun with Dick and Jane, The Number 23, Yes Man, I Love You Phillip Morris), whereas his kid-schtick (Lemony Snicket, Horton Hears a Who?, A Christmas Carol)… did marginally better?
So his latest offering, Mr. Popper’s Penguins, should be of no surprise:
Once upon a time, I thought Kevin James was funny. Not really. I really liked him in Hitch, though, and I guess he was okay on The King of Queens (my problems were more with Leah Remini and Jerry Stiller). Paul Blart: Mall Cop felt like a plain donut after watching the insane Observe and Report, and Grown Ups frankly sucked balls.
But James is in a movie with animals, too, and it only illustrates how far Jim Carrey has fallen. See the talking feces fest here:
Which one wins this Awful Battle?
The cinematic floodgates have been a little dry lately, and it finally appears that there’s hope on the horizon?
A few new previews have made their way online, and as I watch, I wonder if they’ll be any good?
I’m trying to keep my expectations low, hence all the question marks? Wait, that sentence didn’t need a question mark. Did it?
Natalie Portman’s smart for showcasing her Padmé Amidala in her preview, because me thinks Olivia Wilde might be Gungan gunning for her? No. She’s definitely gunning for her.
(SIDENOTE: At least Your Highness looks better than Kröd Mändoon. SIDENOTE WITHIN A SIDENOTE: Kröd is “dork” spelled sdrawkcab.)
I don’t have anything else to say.
I just really cannot wait for this movie.
I drool in anticipation. (<— I was going to go with a few options other than drool, but they bordered on inappropriate.)
The Nickelodeon cartoon this adaptation is based on is one of the best I’ve fully enjoyed, and it’s a shame James Cameron beat M. Night Shyamalan to the film naming pool. (The show was on in 2005. But I guess Titanic earns you more weight for that cannonball than The Happening.)
Anywind, Aang is the Avatar. Fuck Jake Sully.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
Some people believe that the world is going to end December 21, 2012. I, on the other hand, think it already has. Why else would Taco Bell have gotten rid of chili cheese burritos? (NOTE: I considered innumerable options for this “joke,” but the truth is that I really really loved their chili cheese burritos…)
Anychuro, the new movie 2012 is going to be unleashed upon us well before then. Everyone that will see it will be seeing it because of the special effects, and not the actors or their acting. Don’t believe me? Here’s the trailer with all the destruction edited out:
BONUS VIDEO: A recut of the preview as if it was 70’s Grindhouse film. Enjoy.
BONUS PLEA: If anyone out there has any pull at Taco Bell, it would give me new hope to know that they might bring chili cheese burritos back. I mean, seriously, what did chili ever do to you, Taco Bell? You can have potatoes and bacon, and not chili? You can even have BellHedz and not chili?!
See, even these guys look upset you don't have chili cheese burritos anymore...
I’ve seen a few horror films that have creeped me out, and one documentary that reduced me to a shambled mess, but this may the first documentary that gives me the heebie-jeebies (I had it once already as a kid, but I’ve heard you can catch it again, unlike chicken pox, but very much like cooties.)
I dare you to watch the entire preview. In fact, you must watch the entire preview.
Just for clarification: Coinkydink = yes, it’s a coincidence. Coinkydonk = no, that sh– is on purpose.
I’m a fan of the old days when spoofs were actually quality works, and a noble genre in it’s own right. Early Mel Brooks and Zucker Brothersfilms are often sited as classics, but lest we not forget, um, nope, there’s nobody else. Satire is a dying form, mostly because it requires intelligence blah blah blah highbrow chitter-chatter… onto the jokes, man. No seriously, I have never seen a joke on this blog since it started last October.
So speaking of October and spoofs, what about comedy-horror films? For every Young Frankenstein, there’s a Love at First Bite. For every Transylvania 6-5000, there’s a Dracula: Dead and Loving It. For every Saturday the 14th, there’s a Saturday the 14th Strikes Back. And for every Scream, there’s more than enough Scary Movies.
So now we have two more vampire-themed “comedies” heading our way, and it’s Round 189 in “Hollywood’s Run Out Of Ideas So Let’s Make Two Versions Of The Same Movie And Have Them Compete Against Each Other.”
Examples of previous rounds:
The latest entries to the list are Transylmania and Stan Helsing (srsly). Here are their trailers:
The Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk-nesscomes down to this simple question: Do studios release similar movies against each other on accident (dink!) or on purpose (donk!)?
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