With Halloween upon us (and the one year anniversary of this blog’s creation – woohoo!), I’ve recently made a purchase in preparation for the slew of parties coming up.
Usually, there’s not a slew (and only one that may or may not be hosted by me), and usually, I have the energy to make my own costume out of cardboard. Not so this year!
Without giving anything away, like mentioning I picked up a gorilla costume at Target, for example, I fear I might have dunked my toe into the pool of weirdness that is these folks: Humanimals.
Here’s a heads up. Coinkydink means something’s a coincidence. Coinkydonk would be something on purpose. Okay, heads down.
It’s common when traveling America’s roads to see a familiar black-on-yellow figure warning of upcoming road hazards. Most of them are simple in detail, and refer to moving objects.
Looks like the John Deere Playskool model, I reckon.
Deer animals bear the brunt of the signs that resemble squashed bumblebees (sorry, PETA).
It's like that WWII raising the flag statue (sorry Vets)...
Sometimes though, the graphic representations can get a little cartoony.
Is that one duck taunting me?
But when it comes to people, the images representing us are as simple as those on the bathroom stalls.
"We're looking for the restroom. These are newspapers in our hands, if you catch my meaning."
Is it a coincidence that the more detailed the design, the less serious I want to take it? Or is the intention of the designers to make you notice the warning?
So to translate:
Coinkydink – They’re funny.
Coinkydonk – They’re noticeable.
(SIDENOTE: I do find it humorous when people stick electrical tape under the deer on its standard crossing sign.)
I’m a fan of Kurt Vonnegut’s works (I would declare huge fan, but I’ve read less than a handful of his books… oops!), but as I recall in Slaughterhouse-Five, there was a zoo on Tralfamadore that housed Earthlings.
ATTENTION ALL TRALFAMADORIANS!
If you want some fine specimen for your collection, search no further than any local Walmart. If you require samples, check out the menagerie of folks (and their vehicles) at the website People Of Walmart.
And while you’re at Walmart, bathroom cleaning supplies are in aisle five… in case you wanna build a sex toy or something…
I recently found this video of a weird local commercial for, what else, a furniture store:
Consider my mind blown! This couldn’t be real, could it? I mean, was it serious? Did it have lofty goals of promoting racial harmony and couches? Courtesy of my new skill set (BOOM! Research!), I uncovered this…
Ugh. I feel defeated. I wanted that commercial to be legit. I feel duped like most people did with The Blair Witch Project.
(SIDENOTE 1: When I was in high school, parents had to write something great about their kids for the yearbook. My mom didn’t know what to write, so I wrote my own. Some girls in my class had told me they thought what my family wrote was really sweet. For some stupid reason, I told them that I wrote it. The look on their faces must have been like mine when I watched that second video.)
(SIDENOTE 2: When I saw The Blair Witch Project, I took a friend that did not know it was fake. He was relatively unaffected by the flick, but the dude in front of me was freaking out when they found that eye, or tongue, whatever it was, wrapped in gauze. Totally worth it for that.)
So back to the current disappointment. At least this is real, right?
monkeyBLOG monkeyDO 