The Sh–? Just Sh–ty… 2WordStory

There’s some movement in the Detroit area called 2WordStory.  Here’s the homepage from their website:

Seriously? Seriously.

Basically, it’s a church thing.  The one-word question is before you find The Big Guy or Gal or Aliens Upstairs, and the second word is the answer after you find Him or Her or Them.

I’d prefer to use it in other ways, such as in, oh let’s just say, blog commentary:

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Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? The Proactiv Curse

This post was originally going to be about my investigation into the ripping off of Bruce Hornsby (and the Range)’s Mandolin Rain (or is it Tupac’s Changes?) in Proactiv Acne Solutions’ commercials, but then I stumbled onto a greater conspiracy.

What do these young ladies’ have in common?

LiLo, KelCla, JeLoHew

LiLo, KelCla, JeLoHew

They had stellar careers, booming out of nowhere, sky’s-the-limit…

Then they did Proactiv commercials.

How have they fared since?

LayLow - Kelly Clark Bar - Mrs. Jaime Kennedy?!

LayLow - Kelly Clark Bar - Mrs. Jamie Kennedy?!

(SIDENOTE: You may have noticed Jessica Simpson was also in their commercials, but did she really ever have a career?)

My biggest concern of late is this cutie:

Julianne Hough of "Dancing With My Heart"

Julianne Hough of "Dancing With My Heart"

She’s been in Proactiv commercials, and although she’s well-known (?) amongst Dancing with the Stars, country music, and Juicy Fruit fans, I hope to see more from her in the entertainment world.

Ultimately, this comes down to whether or not I’m reading into this (Coinkydink) or I’m onto something (Coinkydonk).

Your drunk thoughts Diddy?

In My Brain While Sleeping… A Movie About Young Lesbians In Love And Kurt Russell And Goldie Hawn

Hawn-Russell is not a character from Star Wars, Pete! I told you so!

Hawn-Russell is not a character from Star Wars, Pete! I told you so!

With a post title like that, you might start to wonder why my lead picture is Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell.  Allow me to explain…

Last night, I had a dream about a movie starring these two entitled The Organization of L.  What the title referred to, I can only assume, is some subconscious reference to The L Word, due to the story of the “movie.”

SIDENOTE: I was contemplating not posting this as not to give anyone any ideas, but then I realized, “Hey, I don’t have anything else to post today.  Plus, I just thought of a funny way to end it.”

The “story” was this: Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn lived in neighboring brownstones in some major city.  Goldie was a progressive-thinking mother.  For example, she let her son – nay, encouraged him – to play with Barbie dolls as well as well as his G.I. Joe’s.  Her college age daughter was a philosopher and a dreamer… and she has been dating Kurt’s college age daughter through most of the past school year.  

Kurt, on the other hand (yet in a similar way), raised his daughter as major league sports enthusiast and a tomboy, having no other children since his wife passed away.  They’re best friends, and he doesn’t want any boy to ever take her away.

Flash forward to summer break.  Both daughters are back home for the summer, and one night, while  Goldie’s daughter stays the night at Kurt’s house, Kurt’s daughter proposes.

Goldie’s delighted; Kurt’s confused.  Hilarity, sentimentality, and maturity ensue!

I mean, it’s not like the subject of gay marriage is timely or anything?  (Miss California’s scandalous topless pic here.)

A real boob (job)

A real boob (job)

And it’s not like anyone’s interested in the heartaches and heart warmings between two college-age lesbians, right?

All right Pete... I'll give you that.  SamRo and LiLo sound like characters' names in Star Wars.

All right Pete... I'll give you that. SamRo and LiLo sound like characters' names in Star Wars.

INGREDIENTS: Two glasses of organic milk, which after drinking, made me feel oddly drunk.

Happy Find… Buseypalooza! Get Garied Away!

Shirley awesome!

Shirley awesome!

There’s a forum on SomethingAwful that has all kinds of Photoshopped madness.  Click here to check it out.

The thread began with the idea of replacing regular folks in home photos with the mugs of celebs.  Example:

Lilo and Stitch

Lilo and Stitch

But it’s since evolved into a Buseypalooza.  There’s not much on there, but to post them all on here would ruin the surprise.  I don’t think it’s active anymore, either, unfortunately, but it still makes me G.R.I.N. (Gotta Recommend It Now… see, Buseyisms aren’t that tough).

Lindsay’n Ya Later, Samantha!

She's the DJ, I'm the Twister

She's the DJ, I'm the Rapper (named Twista)

Oops!

Natural disaster and “Mean Girls” actress, Lindsay Lohan, is about to one up the title of the film that made her a star-on-the-verge-of-something-more.  You know… she’ll be the Meanest Girl.

Samantha Ronson, the DJ-on-the-vag-of-someone-more-famous, has expressed her desire to marry the love of her life, LiLo.

But as all the tabs and blogs have said all along (not verbatim) – you can take the penis out of the white trash, but you really can’t.

From IMDB (b/c I couldn’t find it on NotW):

A source tells British newspaper the News of the World, “Linds is on the brink because Sam won’t leave her side. Whenever she does, Lindsay’s on the phone telling her mates she’s decided she’s not a lesbian.

“Of course she still has feelings for Sam – but she also feels like she has to escape.”

Currently going down in Lindsay’s leggings (from her 6126 clothing line, duh!):

Vagina: L, I’m lonely.
Lindsay: Whatever do you mean?  Sammy’s always been good to you.
Vagina: But L, she’s not enough.
Lindsay: Sammy knows you inside and out.  She understands you and takes care of you.
Vagina: I know…
Lindsay: What’s the problem then?
Anus: Okay, you got me!  It’s not the Vagina, all right!  You know Sammy’s disgusted by me.  But the boys… the boys are really into me…
Lindsay: You’re right.  You win.  You should have told me it was you all along.
Anus: Amen to that, sister!  Emphasis on men.
Lindsay: Mm-hmm.

Finis.