I don’t mean to go and spoil the below video, but spoil you I must:
Hulk's showing off his real American.
What in the flying fuck is this not only doing in a promo for a stupid looking video game, but why in the flying suplex is Hulk Hogan pulling out his thumb wrestler in front of his daughter Brooke?! Whether it’s real or not, it’s really dumb for real.
This could have also been filed under from The Shit To Just Shitty… behold:
I’d never proclaim to be a huge fan of wrestling. Even back before the World Wildlife Fund made them change their name, I wasn’t too into any of the WrestleManias or the Sunday matches. A few of my friends were, though, so the WWE superstars of the day blipped my pop culture radar. And a little cartoon BITD (“back in the day”) also helped:
But since this Sunday (tomorrow) is WrestleMania XXV, I’m going to post the best things I ever think came out of the WWF WWE… BITD, of course.
5) “Macho Man” Randy Savage sure did love him some Slim Jims. Why it’s relevant to me? On a trip to Houston, Texas, there was one day I devoted to eating only Slim Jims and pickles, and drinking MGD. The next day I devoted to the hotel bathroom.
4) Andre the Giant was in The Princess Bride. Why it’s relevant to me? I always thought he seemed like a nice guy, and the movie helped confirm that (if I remember correctly). Man, I haven’t seen that movie in a long time. All I truly remember is the scene where Wesley and the “Inconceivable!” guy keep switching poisoned glasses. And Inigo Montoya, of course.
3) Sargent Slaughter was a G.I. Joe toy and on the cartoon! Why it’s relevant to me? He was on the cartoon! (I wasn’t allowed to collect G.I. Joe because they were too much like Star Wars, according to my mom.)
2) Rowdy Roddy Piper was in John Carpenter’s They Live. Why it’s relevant to me? Just watch this clip and tell me it’s not relevant to you.
1) Hulk Hogan was a Real American. Why it’s relevant to me? Um, Hulk Hogan plays on an electric guitar painted like the American flag standing in front of an American flag like he’s motherfucking General Patton just before a scene of a building being demolished. That’s just the first 30 seconds! And it only gets better, I promise you…