grease

In My Brain While Sleeping… A Fair Amount Of Skin, A Little Bit Of Aliens, And A Whole Lot Of Rapture

Posted on by sgottahurt

I’ve never read the book, Left Behind, nor saw the movie starring Kirk Cameron, but I currently would like to think it went something like this dream.  The references are many, so I’ll place them in parentheses to help you keep up.

Our pilots are Goofy.

Our pilots are Goofy.

While travelling back to her home in Australia aboard Mickey Mouse Airlines, the beautiful star of the hit television show Claire Voyant suddenly finds many of the passengers on her plane have disappeared.  Even the pilots!  Luckily, someone with experience playing flight simulators is present and successfully lands the aircraft.

(NOTES: The Australian actress was Carissa Walford, pictured below.  This past week she’s co-hosted G4TV’s Attack of the Show in Olivia Munn’s place, and she stole my heart, although not Olivia’s place in my heart.  Don’t fight ladies… there’s room.)

(BONUS FACT: I’ve loved Aussie accents since the days of Olivia Newton-John in Grease, so that’s two Aussie’s and two Olivia’s.)

(EXTRA REFERENCE: Claire on LOST is Australian, and the TV show in my dream shares her first name.  Weeyud.  <–Australian for Weird.)

Sugar and Spice, but not in that order

Sugar and Spice, but not in that order

Anywalfordiftheylooklikecarissa, the unnamed actress presented in my subconscious by, um, Carissa Walford, finds out that the Rapture has happened, and she’s one of those left behind (full circle).

(NOTES: The Rapture as portrayed in fiction in the Bible usually means good people are sucked up into heaven.  Here’s Wikipedia’s breakdown, a snorefest.  The Rapture as portrayed by Blondie is here.)

Basically, as it turns out, all the good people didn’t get sucked up to heaven.  It was aliens that did the sucking up, and they sucked up all the idiots to give our planet another chance.  They were big fans of Claire Voyant and decided that she should run the world.  Ever the go-getter, she obliges, and the world’s mantra becomes

The geeks shall inherit the Earth!

INGREDIENTS: Three mini-burgers and fries from Applebee’s, plus numerous pourings of brew.

(My Boss) Paul’s Top Five List… Punk Covers Of 80’s Songs

Posted on by sgottahurt

99 Red Bowling Shirts

99 Red Bowling Shirts

Aaah, the 80’s.  They’re definitely Generation X (and sometimes Y)’s version of our parents and their nostalgic-laden 60’s.  And since my boss, Paul, and I are huge fans of living in the past, Paul thought he’d double-dip in the ethers of remember-when, and present this list:

Top 5 Punk Covers of 80’s Songs

5. Smooth Criminal – Alien Ant Farm
“I was never a big Michael Jackson fan, especially his late 80’s work, but this version makes this song listenable.”

4. Boys of Summer – The Ataris
“While Don Henley’s original has some 80’s nostalgia to it, this is by far a better version.”

3. Come On Eileen – Save Ferris
“Awesome remake by this ska band wit the lead vocal hottie. I can actually understand Dexy’s Midnight Runners’ lyrics with this version.” [Ed. – When I saw saw them in concert, “vocal hottie” Monique Powell had this joke to say:]

What’s worse than Grease on Olivia Newton-John?  Come on Eileen!

2. Take On Me – Reel Big Fish
“One of the best ska bands from the 90’s doing the #1 80’s Hit from A-Ha.  Also, it was featured in the South Park creators’ movie, Baseketball.” [For those stuck more in the 80’s than us, those creators would be none other than Trey Parker and Matt Stone, natch. – Ed.]

1. 99 Red Balloons – Goldfinger
“One of my favorite punk bands doing one the the better songs from the 80’s by Nena.”