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In Defense Of… The Victorious Secrets

Posted on April 23, 2011 by sgottahurt

Most of you may not know who The Victorious Secrets are by name, but last year, they won FSN Detroit’s annoying April in the D contest.

To those of you not from “The D,” April is that time of year when three of our Detroit sports teams – Tigers, Red Wings, and Pistons – are supposed to be playing simultaneously… I say that begrudgingly because it requires two of the teams to make it to the playoffs, and only one has… for twenty years! (The Pistons might pull out of their slump next year with the new owner…)

Anyhoopdreams, back to the contest. Last year, The Victorious Secret won with this song:

Then they went on to win FreeCreditScore.com’s similar contest with this ditty:

And now you see them in these national commercials:

I WANT THEM TO COME BACK AND MAKE ANOTHER APRIL IN THE D SONG!

This is the crap that won this year:

They actually use the phrase raise the roof non-ironically…

It’s a sort of situation when you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone. And yes, I’m saying that non-ironically…

A Handful Of… Drawings Of Superheroes On Bikes

Posted on April 22, 2011 by sgottahurt

I liked these as soon as I saw them, and then I realized all these are getting adapted for movies or TV. So in order of release:

Thor (May 6)… on a bike!
Green Lantern (June 17)… on a bike!
Captain America: The First Avenger (July 22)… on a bike!
Wonder Woman (maybe this fall on TV?)… on a bike!
Amazing Spider-Man (July 3, 2012)… on a bike!
Aquaman (sadly never)… on a bike!

(source)

JusWondering… Is This Ad Kinda Racist?

Posted on April 21, 2011 by sgottahurt

Michigan State Lottery has a ad campaign going on entitled, well, here’s the billboard:
That on its own is good and dandy, but the commercials get me JusWondering what I wrote above. Here’s a screen shot (you can watch the ad by clicking here):

Things that make you go hmm...

What this leads me to believe is that:

African-Americans buy lottery tickets.
Middle Eastern-Americans run convenience stores that sell lottery tickets.
Annoying white kids hailing from families that can afford clear braces are benefiting from this system.
And the only way the African-Americans and Middle Eastern-Americans can benefit is if someone wins?

Am I crazy for noticing/thinking this? Please comment below…

Hibbidy-Wah?! Can I Work For Lucasfilm Pretty Please?!

Posted on April 20, 2011 by sgottahurt

I don’t care that this building will be in Singapore, I still want to go to there:

*Jawas not included.

What’s weird is I wouldn’t care about anything Star Wars anymore if The Clone Wars cartoon wasn’t so good… and that’s exactly what will be produced in this state-of-the-art artists’ haven shaped like a Sandcrawler!

Son of a Sith! It’s not fair!

Worth 1002 Words… Adorable Vs. Frightening Edition

Posted on April 17, 2011 by sgottahurt

Adorable

Meta PETA

Frightening

Sesame Scream

(adorable via / frightening via)

InASense, Lost… Ben Wa, Done That (Not Really…)

Posted on April 16, 2011 by sgottahurt

A little joke recently went by me on FX’s Archer that as a scourer of the TripleDoubleU, I should have known.

It's as if they're standing over me, staring in disbelief...

It involved a character that Archer was dealing with named Benoit. Anytime someone mentioned his associate’s name, Archer would exclaim this:

Benoit balls!

I had no idea why he kept doing this, so I brought it up to some friends, and I learned what Ben Wa balls really were. I’ll let you click the link.

The problem that remains is we have a new Detroit Tiger named Joaquin Benoit, and every time the announcers mention his name, I can’t help but to think…

Ben Wa balls? How about Benoit strikes!

Awesome Battle… Movie Posters Featuring Dogs With Sunglasses

Posted on April 14, 2011 by sgottahurt

When I set out to compile this Awesome Battle, I honestly expected to encounter more fodder for the masses. So in addition to a slide show rolling through the history of movie posters featuring dogs in sunglasses (or any type of eye wear), I decided to seek out the source of this unfortunately underused fad.

To begin, here’s the slide show:

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Now some might be inclined to believe that Carl Reiner’s Summer School poster kicked off the trend, but that was released around the time of Bud Light’s Spuds MacKenzie ad campaign, and Spuds was quite the party animal. Check out his “wild” antics here:

(SIDENOTE: Here’s his “wild” music mix, including “wild” songs by The Beach Boys, Jerry Lee Lewis, and The Human Beinz.)

Spuds MacKenzies Party Faves... Album?

And maybe others might even further think that this Dustin Hoffman classic was the inspiration for it all:

Straw Dogs (1971)

But in reality, you’d have to go all the way back to this Walt Disney classic for the source:

Old Yeller (1957)

(SIDENOTE: Yes, those are Gucci sunglasses on Old Yeller…)

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Mah Nà Mah Nà

Posted on April 12, 2011 by sgottahurt

This little video has been pretty popular lately, and it’s a dark twist on an old favorite. Wait ’til you see where it started.

The latest incarnation – Tune for Two

The old favorite – The Muppets

The new favorite – The Office

The original song – Mah Nà Mah Nà

And here’s the trailer for the movie that song was from – Sweden: Heaven and Hell

A Handful Of… TV Comedies I Need To Own

Posted on April 11, 2011 by sgottahurt

Some of these TV shows are already available on DVD, and some will be available soon. No matter what, I need to own these, and if you don’t know them, I’m very disappointed in you.

Yeah. That’s it. I’m letting these vids do the comedy for me…

Party Down

Check It Out! With Dr. Steve Brule

Ugly Americans

Delocated

Portlandia

Workaholics

JusWondering… Is This Another Controversial Call?

Posted on April 10, 2011 by sgottahurt

The Detroit Lions certainly have a catch in wide receiver Calvin Johnson. Early last season, there was a bit of a controversy regarding one of his catches, and whether it was a completion or not:

But I recently saw this commercial, and it surprised me:

Did it surprise me because they didn’t mention Johnson played for the Lions? No.

Did it surprise me because the Lions are owned by the Ford family and Acura is owned by Honda? Sorta.

Did it surprise me that Calvin Johnson would drive an Acura? Yes.

Of all the cars out there, it stunned me that an NFL player would choose to endorse Acura. That’s the latest controversial call.

Now an Olympic skier, on the other hand, I can see… (and Ashleigh McIvor’s a Canadian to boot):

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