Teddy bears have been around since the conception of President Theodore Roosevelt decided not to shoot a bear tied to tree in 1902, deeming it unsportsmanlike. 

What one really has to do with the other, I don’t know, but keeping that in mind, it sort of paves the way for these future misappropriations of cute widdle fuzzy teddy bears by popular culture, whether it’s…

• The Jetsons Movie creating a Teddy-2 in an attempt to mine cash from later-generation youngsters (did I mention Teddy-2’s father works in a mine?)
• George Lucas force-ing “primitives” to battle inept clones (must watch this vid)
• Snuggle promoting a bear that giggles in ecstasy when cuddling warm towels (or tries to kill housewives)
• Steven Spielberg allowing a toy to be sentimental (or creeeepy)
• a company putting out a toy to enslave the classes (of students)
• Family Guy featuring a sexually confused infant further confused by fantasies involving his “plaything” Rupert
• a low-budget 90’s film using fuzzy buddies as weapons
• or a low-budget 00’s film that… that… just watch this preview.

Even though it may be fuzzy wuzzy, it’s still an AWFUL BATTLE… GO!