TV

Happy Finds… DJ Kitty? Kanye Jordan? Let Me Google That For You

Posted on by sgottahurt

Sometimes the TripleDoubleU has too much goodness to handle.

  • ITEM 1 – All I need to say is DJ Kitty:

Cats in hats are so funny!  Somebody should make a book like that stat!

(SIDENOTE: Also acceptable as “funny” – cats in baseball jerseys, cats using turntables, and cats dancing.)

  • ITEM 2 – Do you like Tracy Morgan’s Tracy Jordan?  Well how about Kanye West’s Kanye Jordan?

Basically, it’s a game in which someone takes Kanye West’s Twitter messages and adds “Liz Lemon” to them, as if he were on 30 Rock.  Not all of them are golden, so some of the better ones can be found here and here.  The actual Twitter page can be found here.

It’s the perfect tool for the times you want to be a passive smart ass.  For my example, click here.

In My Brain While Sleeping… Belligerent Smurfs

Posted on by sgottahurt

Wino Smurf, er, Champagno Smurf?

This one’s a quick one.  My friends and I were at a concert.  We were drinking a craaaazy amount.  Oh.  And we were all Smurfs.  We were in cartoon form, but we existed in the real world, à la Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Or the upcoming Smurfs movie.  But cel animated.  Not CGI*.  Thank you.

Barfly Smurf

*yes, you better Smurfing believe this is happening…

(SIDENOTE: But then again, CGI could look like cel animation.  Take a gander at this Roger Rabbit 2 screen test.  He’s 100% computer generated.)

So, Duh! Pop Quiz… License Plates Edition

Posted on by sgottahurt

I’m on the road a lot for my job, and I’ve seen more than my fair share of stupid personalized license plates.  There are even a few in the parking lot of my office that are idiotic!

So for today’s So, Duh! Pop Quiz, I figured I’d look up a couple celebrities’ personalized license plates, and see if you could figure out whom they belonged to.  Good luck!

(answers after the jump) Read More

InASense, Lost.. The Flintstones Made A Dick Joke?!

Posted on by sgottahurt

This clip comes from Asylum’s list of the Dirtiest Sexual Innuendos in Children’s Cartoons, but I have to put it here because it sort of shocked me.

I know the show originally aired in prime time, but I don’t even think The Simpsons would try what The Flintstones pulled here

– and no, that’s not an innuendo.

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Fantasy Football Is Pokémon Is Fantasy Football

Posted on by sgottahurt

I choose you, Pikacheerleader!

I’ve gotten into way too many arguments about this lately, so I decided to end the battle here once and all.

I say:

FANTASY FOOTBALL IS NO DIFFERENT THAN POKÉMON.

My friends say:

But it is different!  There’s gambling involved!

Well, kids use to gamble their pogs, but that doesn’t make pogs fantasy football.   So allow me to further illustrate the Coinkydinks (or Coinkydonks)…

  • Each competitor chooses their combatants.

Whether it’s Squirtle or Tom Brady, I see no difference here.

  • Each combatant falls into different categories.

Using the two examples from above, you need water-types and quarterbacks, fire-types and tight ends, electric-types and wide receivers… you see where I’m going here.

  • Each competitor sets up their combatants based upon statistics to battle other competitors.

‘Nuff said.

  • Some combatants are ranked higher than others, and competitors go to great lengths to get them.

Chris Johnson was the #1 draft pick in fantasy football this year; when I used to play Pokémon, MewTwo was the bee’s knees.

  • Plus, how much of a difference is there between these:

And these:

  • Oh, yeah… and then there’s that whole fantasy aspect…

(I didn’t know enough about Dungeons & Dragons to make that comparison, but this guy did.)

A Handful Of… Fake Business Cards

Posted on by sgottahurt

I’m letting Fernando Reza of Fro Design do the heavy lifting for me today.

Here’s A Handful Of business cards he made based on unforgettable corporate entities from TV and film.

Okay, here’s my one contribution… that somebody else did:

InASense, Lost… Wham! Bam! No Thank You, Disney BLAM!

Posted on by sgottahurt

I did not know Disney BLAM! existed, nor should I have, as I don’t watch the Disney Channel (that much).  So upon finding these videos, I did not initially realize one of them was a parody, and it just about destroyed me.

Thank Walt Disney’s cryogenically frozen body (or maybe it’s just his head, à la Ted Williams) one’s a fake.  Can you figure out which one before your brain freezes in abject refusal to continue on?

(answer after jump) Read More

Almost The Sh– To The Sh–… The Dana Carvey Show Alumni

Posted on by sgottahurt

People barely remember Dana Carvey, let alone his attempt to break away from his Saturday Night Live shackles, The Dana Carvey Show.  Considered ahead of its time, here are the opening skits from the first episode:

Aside from the advertising sponsored episode titles (in this case, my favorite, Taco Bell), did anything else stand out?

Perhaps some the actors involved?

The 40-Year-Old Version, The Office, Little Miss Sunshine, Get Smart

Strangers with Candy, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, TV Funhouse

Notice any of the writers involved?

Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Lucky Louie, Parks and Recreation, Louie

Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Delocated

Community, Moral Orel, Mary Shelley's Frankenhole

  • Spike Feresten?  (Pssst… He’s the one that’s not Jerry Seinfeld.)

Seinfeld ("Soup Nazi"), Talkshow with Spike Ferensten

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Mike Myers Was A Cheeky Monkey

Posted on by sgottahurt

I had no idea Mike Myers was such a mooch.  There were rumors that he lifted Dr. Evil from Dana Carvey’s impression of SNL creator, Lorne Michaels, but I had no idea he got this idea…

Vodpod videos no longer available.

…from this:

I’m passing no judgment.  It’s more of an I had no idea! revelation.

An additional I had no idea! revelation – the bad guy in Atom Age Vampire looks like he could be Will Ferrell’s Pop or Grandpop (0:30 mark):

Drunken Recollection… Whose Film Catalog Could You Get Stuck With?

Posted on by sgottahurt

Does this tree get HBO?

This has been a question pondered by my friends and I for a while now.  If you were stuck on a deserted island, what Actor!’s film catalog would you want to have with you?

A few fine names were thrown around – DeNiro, Nicholson, Pacino, Dreyfuss…

Of course there was talk of Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Matt Damon, and Hayden Christensen, but my choice came down to two people:

1) Bill Murray
2) Harrison Ford

"I don't see my name down there anywhere!"

With Bill, you get the (my) likes of these:

  • Ghostbusters
  • Little Shop of Horrors
  • Scrooged
  • Quick Change
  • What About Bob?
  • Groundhog Day
  • The Man Who Knew Too Little
  • The Royal Tenebaums
  • Lost in Translation
  • Broken Flowers
  • Get Smart
  • Fantastic Mr. Fox
  • Zombieland

Not to mention his earlier works like Meatballs, Caddyshack, and Stripes, plus in between works like Ed Wood, Kingpin, Wild Things, Rushmore, The Aquatic Life with Steve Zissou, and Get Low!  And there’s even more if you get sick of these!  That’s quite a filmography!

"I don't see your name up there either, Garfield. I wonder if my earring is listed down below."

With Harrison, on the other hand, you get two of the Great Trilogy of Trilogies – Star Wars and Indiana Jones… (Back to the Future is the third, and don’t get your knickers in a twist – nobody counts Kingdom of the Crystal Skull)…

Here’s (my) Harrison’s list:

  • American Graffiti
  • Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
  • Apocalypse Now
  • The Frisco Kid
  • Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
  • Raiders of the Lost Ark
  • Blade Runner
  • Star Wars Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi
  • Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
  • Witness
  • The Mosquito Coast
  • Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
  • Patriot Games
  • The Fugitive
  • Clear and Present Danger
  • Air Force One
  • and, uh, Brüno

Okay, so he sort of fizzles out, but even still… that’s a bunch of flicks I could repeatedly view.

But then, a new person showed up to the proceedings, and suggested we consider character Actors! (turned leads) instead of leads:

I thought that was a pretty good idea, so I changed my answer and picked an up and coming star, Sasha Grey:

"I starred in Steven Soderbergh's The Girlfriend Experience, and you didn't. Hey Harrison, I think I found your earring."