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Awful Battle… Terrible Vampire Names

September 10, 2010

With everybody bitching about the state of the vampire mythos these days, I’m here to remind you it could be much worse.

“Writer” Stephanie Meyer has taken a lot of slack for Twilight and her inability to create compelling character… names.

Edward Cullen, Alice Cullen, Carlisle Cullen, Esme CullenRenesmee Cullen.  (Source: Wikipedia, of course.)

Here are some worse names than those (if they are not, I tried my best):

Cousin Larry Cullen

Blaine Tristan Cullen

D.B. Cullen

Stifler Cullen

Colin Cullen

Justin Bieber

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